Have you ever thought to yourself “I want to bob my head in a way where anyone in a 50-metre vicinity are worried for my general mental health and wellbeing”? Or maybe you thunk “I want to throw my limbs around in an almost-comprehensible manner, like half-boiled spaghetti dangling off a fork”; possibly even “I want some of the music from all different types of pop and rock, and to culminate that all into funk.” Or even possibly “this introduction has gone too long, just tell me the bloody band already”. Well, I can tell you that the band you’re in dire need of is none other than Scary Pockets. And wow, they just released a new album, Funk Walker; ripe off the tree that is iTunes and, after a good, long 33 minutes, I’ve had time to digest and I am now ready to review the hell out of it.
Scary Pockets is a band that was formed at the start of 2017 by the musical talents of Jack Conte of Pomplamoose fame (he also co-founded Patreon) on keys and Ryan Lerman, who did stuff for Ben Folds and John Legend, on the guitar. The interesting part about Scary Pockets is that Conte and Lerman are the only two permanent members, while the drummers, bassist, vocalists and any other musicians are swapped around, which creates an interesting dynamic. Recurring members include Sam Wilkes on bass, Tamir Barzilay on drums, India Carney on vocals and Rai Thistlethwayte on both vocals and guitar.
But you probably don’t care about all that. It’s all about the sound. As this is funk, I’ll tell you what I look for in a delicious, funk-alicious song, and, by extension, album.
1. A sense of theming. Themes for songs are very important, and you need to make sure that the music represents the feeling to a T. And Frightening Mini-Pant-Bags blow it out of the park. Oops,…I Did It Again! is dirty and scandalous, just like a normal Brittany Spears song, except, you know… good. The Scientist is calming and soothing, like the word Coldplay (am I making it obvious that I don’t listen to Coldplay?), and Somewhere Over The Rainbow, arguably my favourite song on the album is fun and jaunty, giving a lively feel to an originally sweet and sad song, bringing in more of the hopeful side of the song, and less of the possible-holocaust-metaphors.
2. Sound. Probably the most important part of any song is the sound. I don’t care if you’re dressed up as Ned Flanders, that guitar has some crappy tonality. Thankfully, not only is Terrifying Trouser-Holes not dressed as a character from the Simpsons, but they have some nice sounds. The electric keyboard roars in a raw, vintage buzz, the guitar has a great plucky feel, the drums sound muted and expressive and some of those bass lines are more tasty than a Big Kahuna Burger. And the vocalists? Every single syllable is like an opera in itself, everyone’s range and talent is just unbelievable.
3. The funk factor. What makes or breaks a funk-alicious tune is the funk factor. When you’re listening to a particular song of funk sovereignty, how much does the head bob: like a chicken with turrets syndrome in their head, or a gentle breeze over a rock? Do your shoulders shimmy like the engine of the mix between a train, a cyclone and a dragon because it’s awesome, bloody fast and extremely dangerous, or is it more the little engine that couldn’t? And although some songs are more chill than the others (i.e., The Scientist), a lot of them are worthy of funk royalty, and are, as to put it in the words of a colleague of mine, ‘bangers’, both metaphorically and literally if those shoulders are too out of control.
In summary, the second album by Scary Pockets: Funk Walker, is well worth your time. As well as their other album. One of my favourite thing about Scary Pockets is that even though they have existed for less than a year, they are one of the most productive bands out there, releasing two albums and many additional singles, some of which aren’t on any album! So download their stuff, watch their Youtube videos, listen to them on Spotify, whatever. Just listen to them and allow yourself to relax, listen to some beautifully crafted music and just funk the funk out.
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