"Since when were you interested in parties?" Robin asks around a sly grin. She isn't even eating anything because she's so caught up in taking this opportunity to tease me. Damn woman.

"He's going because of a girl," Junior replies and yet again I am tempted to kill the guy for the second time this evening.

Riley and Robin gasp and ask in that freaky twin unison way, "You like a girl!"

"Why do you ask that as if it's a miracle that I like a girl?" I ask, slamming my head into the table in defeat. "Why is everyone shocked she's a girl? I am not gay!"

"Could have fooled us," Robin giggles. "I mean you're always getting denied or dumped. We figured you were just trying to get a few as cover ups and stay in the closet a bit longer."

“Do bisexuals no longer exist? When did this happen?” Riley chimes in, making me roll my eyes.

Junior, being the ass that he is, nods in agreement with the girls. I give him a look that shows how betrayed I feel that my best friend is siding with my sisters. Why is no one ever on my side?

"Don't get too excited, Robin. Even if he has this girl, she'll dump him in the end like the others," Riley says sounding far too chipper and gives me a wink that I glare at.

No one in my life has any faith in me. What have I done to deserve such useless family and friends?

Robin, with a mouth full of pizza, snaps her fingers in my direction. She continues to do this, eyes slightly closed and lips pursed. I don't know what she's trying to do so I stare curiously at her until, finally, the light bulb atop her head glows and she says, "That Gavin dude you hang out with!"

"What about him?" I ask with a quizzical look.

"Take notes from him. He gets women all the time. With him as your wing man, you'll definitely keep this chick and, hopefully, finally pop your cherry!"

I grimace at the excitement she has at the idea of me losing my virginity. Why is that so important? Everyone calls me a virgin like it's a bloody insult! Why does everyone make it sound like I'm from another planet for being a virgin? And why the hell are they so interested in helping me lose it? They're weirdos, the lot of 'em!

"He's going with him to the party this weekend," Junior chimes in. I almost forgot he was here. He has been silently eating away at the pizza, having almost finished a full one on his own.

I've changed my mind. Junior is the black hole. Robin and Riley had to work together to finish one but Junior's nearly done! Where does it go? He's a fucking twig.

"Perfect," Riley says. "Ask him for some tips, Noah."

"Can you all at least to pretend that you have some faith in me to do this on my own? I'd feel-"

"No." All three of them say in unison.

"Wow...thanks guys, really, you're so kind and helpful."

"We know." Again with all three of them. Since when did Junior join the freaky twins and their telepathy? You know what, I don't even want to know.