Jayden’s pov

''I’m really sorry sweetie I want you to know that if you need anything you just need to call me ok?'' That was Ms. Resebelt, my neighbor, she was a good person I knew she meant well, but at this particular moment I didn’t want to talk with anybody, didn’t feel like it. I just wanted to be left alone and be forgotten from the world, yeah… that would be nice.

''I know and Thank you Ms. Resebelt I appreciate it now if you excuse, I need to speak with Lili''  I said trying to smile, just to fail miserably, she nodded at me and told me to stop calling her by her last name, Melly or aunty Melissa was better because it didn’t feel old. I don’t know why she said that thought, she was only 40 and was looking great for that age. But well, I just apologized and said that sometimes I forgot, after that, she kissed me in the forehead, I like it every time she did that, she was the closest idea I had from a mother figure.

I gave her a half smile and then I went out of the building to find Lili. She is the best friend in the world. I have known her since we were infants. We were and still are always there for each other. I’m grateful every day to have her by my side, especially now….

''Jiji!''  I think I jumped 10 feet in the air when she called me appearing out nowhere.

''God Lili, you scared me!''  I told her putting a hand on my chest, this girl… I don’t know how she does it but she always do that, scare me or surprise me I mean.

''Yeah, sorry, you know me, I’m pretty sneaky'' she said shrugging her shoulder.

''That you are my friend!''  I mentioned totally agreeing with her, she has scared the shit out me so many times, the girl will disappear and show herself again out nowhere without no one noticing. How she does it? I’ll never know. Never the less, I love her jut the way she is.

''Can’t stay inside anymore huh?''  she asked me with a worried look, I nod answering her question.

''I’m going to explode if I stay here one more minute……I just can’t, is too painful''  I sigh lowering my head

''I need to release, I….''

''You what!''  She interrupted me looking dead serious but with sad eyes ''Jayden, you can’t go there, not today, you haven’t healed completely yet. Please don’t go, I don’t want to see you all bruise again''  She was holding my face in her hands as she said it. She was worried, I know, and I couldn’t blame her, this place I’m going ..... it was not a pretty one.

''I’ll be fine Lili really''  I reassured my friend holding her hands

''But… you promised Rose that….''

''Rose is not here anymore''  I stopped her right there. I didn’t mean to sound harsh or offensive but I couldn’t help to raise my voice a little, is just…. The memory of her… Rose, it is a sensitive topic for me, I know what I promised but right now, ‘’there’’, was the only place where I could release just a tiny bit of the burden I have on my shoulders. I’m sorry Rose, here I am, in your funeral breaking my promise, but I have to do this, it's the only thing I can do right now to feel less… less of this pain that is killing me from inside. Lili was looking me with wide open eyes …. Shit, I messed up again.

''I’m sorry I’m sorry Lili, I didn’t mean to yell at you or anything, I just… I feel I’m going mad right now and I have to stay sane to remember the amazing woman she was, I ….''  I sighed closing my eyes just to open them again to look into Lili’s amber ones and say…

''I need to do this, please understand, I need you to''  I told her almost begging.

''I do understand Jiji, I just worry about you, you know? Please be careful and call me once you are done, I need to know that you are safe'' She said with a smile.

''I will''  I told her while hugging her.

''Besides, when have I lost a fight? and I have only returned with 3 or 4 bruises at most, right?''

''Hmmm, good point'' She said while nodding

''Ok, I’ll go now, tell my dad I went out to take some fresh air or something.''

''Or something……….''  She said that like she was still not convinced and didn’t like the idea of me going ‘’there’’ in the slightest, I put my hands together like I was praying and gave my famous puppy eyes…. Yes, with all the serious look I have on my face, I can do the puppy eyes.

''Ok Ok go, go before I change my mind, I’ll cover for you.''

''Thank you, you are the best''   I kiss her on the cheek and ran off to my bike afterwards, yeah, my bike, I didn’t have a car yet, you couldn’t get your license being 15 so, a bike was good for now.