"hi i'm Ravioli! A half orc cleric" " is your friend okay?" points to player who is only one still unconscious after players have passed out, keeps rolling so poorly he just lays there                                                                                            DM: " At this point you have sleep paralysis."                                                            "Raviolis introduction sparks nightmares, you dream of terrifying bowls of   pasta."                                                                                                                        DM: you finally wake up                                                                                            P: "PASTA."                                                                                                                  other P: "you should've yelled spaghett."

player killed blight, turns out he speaks blight language as wood elf and has to stand there as other blight cries over his friend, " WHY JERRY, YOU HAVE CHILDREN AND A WIFE." "WHO WILL SUPPORT THEM NOW."                            The player spends 2 sessions crying until,                                                          DM: you finally stop crying,     P: its like the fire hydrant just ran out of water.

DM: its your turn now who do you attack? P: well who's around me?              DM: ... weeell, there is that poor vulnerable blight crying over his deceased friend.                                                                                                                              P: *lisp* thim thorry, i thave thoo tho thisth, I didnth mean fur thhings thoo thurn out thiss way." 

DM: well the walls of this chamber are made of vines. As the blights limbs fall off or they die they just melt into the walls and floors."                                          20 minutes later,                                                                                                        P: guys i just realized. we're fighting blights, and this cave is made of... vines." *Players proceed to freak out, to the DM's delight*

P: we haven't encountered any dragons yet. *humpf*                                      DM: don't give me any ideas, sometimes people complain or make predictions and i think, hey that's WAY better than what i had planned! so i make it come true. be careful what you wish for.