"So you remember that business trip last month that I went on ?" Ethan questioned.

Reagan tried to chew her food quickly, covering her mouth with her hand, "The one for Braverman account? Yeah, I remember." She reached forward for her beer, chasing her mouthful of french fries.

He shifted in his seat, expression a little more serious, "Well I was also there for an interview. I didn't say anything cause I wasn't even sure I would get the job, they were looking a lot of other candidates." Reagan could feel her heart beating a little harder as his words began to settle in. They had been dating for three months now, and she felt at times that she could love this man given time but other times she questioned if it was too soon.

"I got the job, Reagan." He gave her an award winning smile.

She felt like she was starting to drown but she forced a smile to her lips, "That's so great, Ethan. I am so happy for you."

Ethan reached across the table, grabbing her hand in his. Reagan swallowed the lump in her throat as his thumb traced circles on the back of her hand, "I love you, Reagan."

She sucked in a sharp breath, "What?" her voice was faint.

He stared into her eyes with an intensity she wasn't prepared for, "I know it's only been three months but I am in love with you. It's okay I don't expect you to say it back." He gave her a reassuring smile that did nothing to reassure her. This date was quickly spiraling out of control.

"Ethan..."

"At least say you'll come with me when I move. I want to see where this thing between us is going." Ethan was full of hope and brimming with love but Reagan didn't feel the same way. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She felt like the walls were closing in around her.

"Ethan..."

He continued to ignore her in his excitement, "You spend most nights at my apartment anyway. So I doubt it would be that much of a change."

Reagan yanked her hand from his, "Ethan, stop." he gave her a surprised look as she pushed up from the booth, "I can't do what you're asking..."

His brows furrowed, " I don't understand. Don't you want to be with me?"

She bit into her cheek, "I do, but I can't move in with you. Let alone move to a completely different city with you. I told you I wanted to go slow...that's definitely not slow. I'm just not ready for that step, Ethan."

"This is my dream job, Reagan."

She gave him a forced smile, "And I am happy that you landed it. Maybe we can try to work out something long distance for time being? I could fly there for weekend trips or something once a month."

Ethan's expression grew more distant as she continued to speak, "I don't want a part-time girlfriend, Reagan."

"And I am not ready for what you're asking, so what do we do, Ethan?" He leaned back into his seat, shoulders sagging as she watched him come to the same realization that she had five minutes prior. It was something that she hadn't wanted to accept but knew that it was the right decision for both of them.

Reagan breathed in deep, "I wish you the best, Ethan. I really do." he looked like he meant to say something, maybe stop her from leaving but she threw up her hand to stop him, "Please don't make this harder than it needs to be. Let this be a clean break, that's what I need this to be."

His lips pinched together as he gave a nod of his head. Reagan turned away from him with one last smile, hoping he understood that she held no ill will against him. Her feet carried her quickly through the bar. She needed fresh air, she felt like she was suffocating.

Reagan pushed the side door open in a rush, letting it bang off the wall as she lunged herself outside into the alleyway. She sucked in a few shallow breaths, letting the warm rain soak into her skin and bring her back from the edge. She wrapped her arms around herself, throwing her head back to stare up at the dark skies above. She knew that this was the right decision but it was still hard. It felt like every step of this year had been hard, and just kept getting harder.

"Hey." Austin's voice echoed off the brick walls.

She turned her eyes towards him, strands of wet hair sticking to her face, "Hey." Her voice sounded soft and fragile, just like how she felt at the moment.

He moved towards her with a calm swagger, stopping to stand beside her, turning his face up to the dreary evening sky, "Nothing better than summer rain." Reagan waited for him to say something more to her, but he was silent. He just stood silently beside her like a tree weathering the storm, trying to shield her from the wind and the rain.

Tears began to fall down her cheeks, "Have you ever been in love?"

He took a minute to reply, "I'll have you know I was engaged once." She found herself surprised by the news but kept it to herself, right now she needed a distraction from the pain in her chest. Sure, she hadn't been head over heels for Ethan but it still hurt.

It hurt more because she had loved the idea of the man and less the man himself. He had represented the things that she had thought she had wanted, but it turned out she didn't know what she wanted anymore. Reagan felt lost, unsure of anything she was doing. What if she was completely fucking herself over? What if she never found someone to love and share a life with?

"Casey. That was her name." She turned her eyes to Austin, studying him as he continued to share, "I'd never met anyone like her. She blew me away and I underwhelmed her. She really hated me when we first me, but I'm a very persistent person."

She found herself smiling despite her current feelings, "So I've learned."

Austin let out a heavy sigh, "She the reason I opened this bar. She was the one that pushed me to do it. Casey just had this ability to make people want to be the best versions of themselves." It looked like the weight of the world was resting on his shoulders, face pinched together in pain.

"What happened?" Reagan asked in a soft voice.

"She got sick, cancer." She thought she saw a tear slip from the corner of his eye but she couldn't be sure it wasn't just the rain, "She was the best of me, and sometimes the worst. I never loved another person the way I loved her."

Reagan found herself reaching out and taking hold of his hand, gripping it tightly. She didn't have any words. She wasn't sure if there were any words, at least none that would change what had happened.

Austin gave her hand a squeeze, turning his face to finally meet her gaze, "Trust me, you're doing just fine, Red. I promise."

She couldn't stop the sob that broke free. She wasn't crying for Chase or for Ethan. She was crying for herself. These tears were for her and the dreams that had died. Strong arms were wrapping around her, pulling her into a firm chest. Austin didn't say anything else. He just held her, rocking her gently back and forth in the summer rain while she cried.