Death. 

A concept just as elusive as life itself. A one-way trip to a place beyond everything you’ve ever known. Quite literally, no one’s lived to tell the tale. Literally. But of course, people have made guesses. I didn’t know what to expect when it was my turn to kick the bucket. Whatever it was, I could at least be comforted by the fact that I had a good 3-4 seconds of conciousness left to mentally prepare myself. That should be enough time, right?

When I first opened my eyes , I was basically flashbanged. Shimmering lights were all around me, as if I was drifting through the dark depths of the ocean surrounded by the strangest fish. Though, I don’t think they were fish at all; rather balls of light, each one shining a unique color. Some were pink, green, aquamarine, and so on. An odd rainbow, but it beat the void I was expecting. But if the theory of pure dark was true and I would be subjected to this forever, I was gonna have some not-so-nice things to scream.

The shapes continued their undertow-like flow while I was dragged by the power of gravity. As my eyes adjusted to the light, there wasn’t a cloudy paradise, nor a fiery pit of torture either. Instead, there was just a very ugly planet. Its surface was covered in silk colored clouds that quickly cleared out the deeper I descended. The air was dry and dusty, and as the puffs of unknown chemicals in the air finally cleared out, I saw it. A cityscape cluttered with structures of great range and strange shapes. It made me think I was seeing some kind of funky painting made by a crazy person.

But my view of the metropolis got smaller and smaller, as I felt myself narrowing in on the ground, clouds and birds passing me as I crashed into an annoyingly garish umbrella, tipping it over the table it was attached to before falling on my back. The sky was sickly tan, and certainly didn’t help the constant feeling of spinning in my body. I let out an ached groan before some posh voice broke the ringing in my ears. His voice was gruff yet raspy, as if he was a revived mummy. “By jov! A new arrival!”

My vision still felt blurry as though I were a newborn, opening its eyes for the first time and observing the world before me. The less “miracle-of-life” part about that was the fact that as I got my bearings, I saw the back of what I could only assume was a hand; or at least, what was intended to be a hand. It was more like a stub made of pale felt and metal spikes. As I rotated it, I dawned on the fact that the hand was none other than mine. I glanced down to the rest of my body and let out a tremble at what I had become; my body was plush with skin of felt; all in various shades of blue, separated by thick stitches. My breath began to hasten as I glided my new claws along my head and torso.

“Son? You feelin’ quite alright?” asked the man. I didn’t want to answer him, I wanted to ask; question what was happening, why I was here, and where “here” even was. Yet as I looked up to him. everything stopped. Before me stood a big-boned fellow sporting an oddly clean suit. His skin was a vile yellowish-green and his face looked like it was falling apart; his flesh was barely hanging onto his skull and his white eyes were aimed in two different directions, yet as his dry lips spread into a grin, I knew it was aimed at me. And that’s about the time I ran.

I felt like I had basically been born again, but I still managed to make good distance along the tiled path. Everyone around me seemed to go by in a blur, but frankly so did the path in front of me. Hell if I knew where I was even running to, at that point I just needed to run. I bumped into a few folks, and felt sick everytime I did; not for stress reasons, but rather on account of how alien they felt. Some were fuzzy, a lot were sharp, and some were even slimy (I still had a bit of weird sludge caught on my shoulder afterwards). But it was the woman who stopped me dead in my tracks that reminded me why I was in a panic.

My rush was cut off as I slammed into the wall-like back of another ghoulish figure, and before I knew it I was on the ground. Oddly enough, I felt the impact, but not really the pain. What should have felt like a brutal car accident, I recovered from like a mere bump on the head. As I glanced up,  grumbling at what happened, my complaints were met with a violent banshee’s shriek that smelled of spoiled food. A horribly melty mouth connected to an even more decayed looking face confronted me with anger in its eyes.

“WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOIN, FELTFACE.” She bellowed, trying to fix her bent posture as she rose to tower over me. As I looked closer, I noticed how oddly transparent her body was. She had a body like a bear yet she didn’t seem to block any vision, only distort them. “I take no business hauntin’, but I could crush you to bits if that’s what ya want.”

“Eurgh… S-Sorry?” I weakly muttered back, unsure of what I was looking at. Was this lady really a ghost? It would be the nicest description I could give her; her arched back and aged face were making it hard for me to call hersomething respectful. “Look uh… lady, d-do you think you can tell me where I am?”

“Oh? Lil’ doll boy is lost, is he?” She taunted, her sunken eyes shifting with disapproval as she crossed her anchor-like arms. “Well I’ll have ya know, you’re in the way of me getting important stuff done! Dead Weight has no time to cater to lil’ lost orphans.”

“Yeah well, evidently ‘Dead Weight’ doesn’t have time to brush its teeth either.” I rebuttled, snarkily waving my hand in my face. I tried to pinch my nose for extra effect but it only dawned on me then that my own facial assets were lacking. “Huh… Well that’s weird. How was I able to smell you then?”

Caught up in my own little journey, I hardly noticed the angry seething that was lodding over me. My hands drooped to my sides as I stared up at the enraged phantom, her fists the size of crane claws rose above me. With the weight of a wrecking ball, I was hit across the face and set off the ledge of the building. The fall was much higher than I would have expected, but it wasn’t a high enough distance for me to let out a scream. Instead my body merely rang out a soft thud as the upper part of my back splattered straight against a hard road.

I found myself sitting upright once more only a few seconds after, scanning my body up and down for any injuries; or in my case, any gashes or dents; and there did seem to be a few. Namely a violent bursted seam between the different colored fabric of my left arm. In spite of all that’s happened so far, it was this minor wound that forced a sting of pain in me the more I prodded at it. Lost in thought once more, I only turned around when the sound of the approaching engine was close enough to bother my thought process. And I had space to scream this time!

I covered my face and curled up into a ball, about to take another blow of several tons… or at least that’s what I had thought. But much to my astonishment, the vehicle came to a screeching halt. And as I took a peek, I saw the smokey grille of a pick-up truck. It didn’t seem to be a brand I was familiar with, albeit it did look like it had mods similar to that of my Abuelo Ricardo (Mom wanted me to stay away from that guy.)

As I was observing the peculiar (and admittedly pretty damn cool) pick-up, I could hear its door opening and quickly slamming. I got up in a crouch, wondering if I would need to make a run for it. But from the side of the vehicle was a young sounding voice.

“Woah, dud are you good?” asked the driver as he slowly stepped out and into my view. He was a bit taller than me and oddly enough seemed human. His skin looked drained of nutrients, but his body seemed to be intact. In place of his arms and the upper part of his head seemed to be strange televisions. His head specifically was half composed with some sort of gray monitor, showing square eyes that reflected his expression. “I-I’m really sorry, you kinda fell outta nowhere, and you’re like, really small compared to the other dudes here.”

A part of me was ecstatic that this kindly stranger was referring to me as a dude; maybe this new form had more perks than I expected. But I couldn’t let that distract me from what I wanted to know. I looked around the mostly quiet road before glancing back at the stranger, noticing his TV antennae seemed to twitch with a small droop. The way they moved was a bit distracting; I couldn’t understand why anyone looked the way they did.

“Uh… plush, guy? I didn’t scare your brains away, did I?” He asked, pixely eyes animating into a squint. I was taken out of my daze and was dimly babbling for a good moment there. Maybe he did scare me into stupidity after all. “Okay look, we got off on the wrong foot I’d say. Let’s just exchange info like adults and move on; So, what’s your name, pal?”

“Oh! Uh… ” I stammered. “My name’s Xavier. Xavier Rosario.”

“Oh… ” I couldn’t explain how I knew, but something in his mind seemed to click as his eyes widened, his mouth a gape before shifting into a smile. His posture seemed to loosen a bit as he stepped up, circling me in observation. “Man, that’s totally my bad! I didn’t realize you were new!”

“Uh… If you’re referring to the fact that I just got here, yes I am?” I tried to maintain some distance from the stranger. He stood a few feet away, yet his antennae seemed to perk up, bending as if they had minds of their own. “Look, could you just tell me where the hell I am, or how to go home?”

He seemed to grimace, his smile dropping to a frown as he clutched his hands together; his fingers tapping together as let out an exhale. “Oh… you still haven’t pieced it together?” He asked. “I mean, I guess it’s not obvious at a first glance.”

“What? Pieced what together?! That everyone here is deformed? That I’m actually in a coma and this isn’t real?” I ask. “Please tell me that the second one is correct.”

“Well… it’s… a bit easier if I show you. Or harder depending on how well you can stomach stuff like this.” He said, putting forward his claw and opening each finger spreading open to a blocky surface of a palm.

I glance shiftily at his offer, scanning him for any hint of mischief. It was hard to tell with half his face concealed by a screen. Perhaps it was a bias on my part, but something about his smile made my muscles less strained. My body slouched down into a hunch as I raised my right hand. A part of me felt like I would vomit in my mouth as I saw my arm and hand sagging as if they were broken as my wrist seemed to literally do all of the heavy lifting. I allowed my hand to drop into his.

“Just… tell me what I’m doing here, man.” I said, waiting for an answer to even one of my questions.

With a more clenched grip and a glint of excitement in his eyes, he turned around and began dragging me along, up the road and into a more open area. I managed to keep up with him and soon realized just how long my arms became. Why do I still feel short?

As I ran alongside him, I glanced up at the building we were circling and in the excitement of my arrival didn’t notice where I actually  landed. The road we walked was at the foot of a modern castle the size of a mall and built on a hill. As my eyes fell to the floor, I saw various different freakshows that felt as though they had come from a book. I wasn’t sure if I should feel better or worse about whatever I was.

“Okay now stop!” He exclaimed, cutting my thoughts short as he posed in front of me. “Now let me ask you this: What was the last thing you remember?”

I looked at him quizzically, wondering what his angle was.  I tried to clear out everything that’s happened and recall what came before the colorful drift. “I was… running away. From home.” I said, slowly.

“I see…” He said before crossing his arms and putting a finger to his lip.

“I remember being angry about something. I was packing my things…” I continued, my words slowing in execution as I gathered more and more. “And walking out the door in a really bad storm. I don’t think I had a specific direction, but I made my way towards the forest, I think? There was a river with a bridge, but it was old and rickety. I crossed it and right as I did, I remember seeing a strike of lightning and… I then… I remember falling.”

The stranger peered at me with a still face, furrowing his brows before letting out a sigh. “... And then you woke up in the sky?” He asked. He pointed upwards with a rising motion before swinging his arm back down. “And then you had your little plummet.”

It took a moment to say it out loud. I felt a lump in my throat as my plush legs began to feel more liquidy by the second. I took a second to look at my hands again before taking some steps back, looking at the fantastical world around me as all my weight seemed to pile into my back. But before I reached the point of no return, I saw the stranger had taken both of my hands; The dizziness didn’t quite stop, but with a tug I was back on my feet. I tried to make more sense of things, only then recognizing how hasty my breathing was.

I tilted my head back to meet his gaze as the sinking feeling remained. “I… I died?” I asked, with a crack in my voice. I sensed no form of liquid in my face, but I swear I could feel the welling tearst. “I still don’t  understand. Is this… Heaven?”

“Uh, not exactly, little dude, sorry.” He stuttered. In spite of his sorrow matching a fraction of my own, his mouth seemed to curve in a smirk. “But don’t worry! It’s not Hell either, promise! And I’m telIin’ you now, you got the dead-dude lottery!”

Before I could ask, he did a small twirl and squeezed my shoulders, pushing me forward to just before the railing of the balcony we stood on. My eyes rose to see a proper view of the city I had fallen into a mere few minutes ago and I had to admit: Much less scary from here. At a distance, it looked mundane, but the closer I looked the more details that popped out to me. There was a large sandy temple, vibrant flora snaking its way up the side. Around the lower levels was a beached ship big enough to be converted into some kind of business, decorated in ropes that seemed to scatter across the entire block. In the distance was a hotel that looked like it was taken from the 1840s, made of wood, yet decked out in electrical signs. The more I looked, everything was a different color, a different aesthetic, a whole different timeline. In the sky were not planes, but people; creatures with wings, propellers, and other manning absurdly proportioned vehicles. Along the grounds of the city were various lakes and streams, connecting it to the ocean. Like the people inhabiting this place, no one was the same as the next. I looked around at the scenery with my mouth feeling agap. Ahead of it all, on the hill parallel to the one this mall seemed to reside on was a grand mansion. Next to it were giant letters adjacent to that of the Hollywood sign. The stranger spoke up from behind me. “Little dude…” He said.

“Welcome to Charonsville!”