For Roman: Heavy the crown sits

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XXth September 18xx

Before our return home, a report went out:

-The battle was lost. -The King severely injured. - And the young Princes; dead.

Mother was so frail and quite pale as she slept. I didn't wake her for fear of startling her. The doctors said she had collapsed upon hearing the report.

My heart pains me to see her this way but I must remain strong now. I cannot afford to become undone. Not now.

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**

**

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XXth September 18xx

I am unable to sleep. My brothers and Cyrus visit me whenever I do.

Even now, though I am quite awake, thoughts of them plague me.

My head hurts.

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XXth September 18xx

A loyal, long serving comrade, cousin and I daresay, my closest and only friend: Cyrus indeed was to me. No one can truly replace him. There was no one else I wholly trusted. I shall ensure that his family is well cared for.

As for my own; broken, it now is.

As I reflect, I realise that my brothers knew me little. And I shamefully admit, I them.

And now they are both gone from me.

I felt alone even while in their presence, but now, I truly am.

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XXth September 18xx

Nightmares again. I hate feeling this way. Why am I not able to control it? My eyes are heavy but I shall not be returning to bed. An early start to the day is what's best anyway.

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**

**

[Mid-afternoon]

The grey clouds, weighty with its many droplets, caressed the ridges of mountains to the north. And slowly, and with much surety, it enveloped all the greenery below till the sky and the highlands became one.

Vicious were the winds which tore through. Whipping the branches and bending low the strong trees. And with a fearsome crack of light and a terrifying boom immediately afterwards- it signalled the start. The expected yearly rains had arrived.

Sweeping swiftly southward, it poured - with much thanks, upon much of the dry and thirsty lands of the Southern Kingdom.

[Late - One evening]

*

(Quite unusual for that time of year, a stormy night in August occurred.)

(Lightning flashed; and through every window, it brightened the entire dark interior of the Castle, casting its own eerie shadows, which lasted for less than a second. Then, just as sudden, the sound of sharp, crackling thunder exploded overhead.)

(A few moments after and then, a different sound)

-PLAP! -PLAP! -PLAP! -PLAP!

-huff! huff! huff!-

(It was the sound of little bare feet running along the marble like floor, echoing in the still and dark hallway.)

(Another flash of bright white light.)

(This time it briefly shone upon a young child found running up the wide corridor dressed in a nightgown and dragging along his small blanket behind.)

(Thunder boomed; rattling the windows.)

(The little child flinched and he felt his heart jump.)

(Now standing in front of a large two panelled door, he breathlessly knocked repeatedly with his tiny fist, his eyes squeezed shut.)

(With a soft creak, one of the doors slowly opened and a woman appeared in the entranceway. Dressed in an ivory silken robe; her pale skin and the long fair hair that draped her shoulders and down her back, made it as though she were the embodiment of light itself. All of her shone within the darkness.)

(Gentle eyes of a cold blue, made quick notice of the child and she bent low with a concerned smile - kneeling onto the cool flooring she softly inquired)

-- Mm? What's wrong my precious one?

Young child: -sob-

-- Shhh...there, there. Don't fret

(She reached forth and brought the child near, wiping his tears and then hugging him tightly.)

(As one was the embodiment of light - The man, who now appeared from within the room behind the woman, seemed to be invisible as he stood over them, hanging in the darkness.)

(He was fair but his dark hair, beard and robe gave the impression that it swallowed all light around him. Only his deep grey eyes pierced through. And as he angrily stared down at the woman holding the child, he said with much disdain)

-- What annoyance is this?

(Hurried footsteps sounded; coming ever closer towards them. It was the steps of a slim woman, a servant. She arrived out of breath and flustered and greeted them all by saying)

Servant: My lady. m-My King? y-Your Majesties.

(The man then demanded)

-- What's the meaning of this? Why is the child here?!

(The young servant at once bent deeply forward, her eyes stared at the floor as she explained)

Servant: m- My King, the Crown Prince became afraid of the lightning storm. So, he...he came running this way

(Enraged that the child was still being comforted, he slapped away his Queen's hand and pulled the little boy away.)

King: What do you mean by afraid?

(Still tightly holding onto the child's arm, he glared downwards at him and sternly said)

King: Stop your crying! There are worse things to be afraid of, child. Now get back to bed!

(The King then flung him towards the servant.)

(He sniffled as he rubbed his arm with his blanket, and looked towards his mother.)

(Still kneeling on the cold floor, she gave him a gentle smile and a tiny nod; it was only then that he slowly took hold of the kind servant's hand.)

(While being hurriedly pulled away, he glanced behind to again lovingly view his mother; but instead became startled by the suddenness of the door slamming shut.)

**

**

Awakened by the sound of someone incessantly rapping against the door; he silently cursed at the annoyance.

He wanted some time alone. To enjoy his evening bath. However, it appeared that he had fallen asleep for quite some time as he soaked in the tub.

A streak of lightning unexpectedly flashed, causing him to involuntarily flinch.

Angry with himself for even quivering at such a thing, he stepped out of the bath and barked at the door.

Roman: What is it?!!

-- My Prince. Is everything alright in there? You've been in there for some time now..

Roman: -sigh- Yes! I'm fine..

-- With the lightning storm happening...maybe, perhaps consider coming out of the bath now, Your Royal Highness?

He sat on the edge of the tub and sighed again before saying

Roman:  Very well

**

**

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XXth September 18xx

To command respect out of fear. Is this what father tried to instil in us?

Being fearful - Father's sternness has had its benefits, I will admit. For he realised and knew what I only assumed in my younger years.

Appearing strong, without flaw, determined - only proves to others who follow you, that you are fit to lead. And being fearful, not an option. It never is. Though I understand his methods, I secretly sometimes wish it were not so.

**

I fell asleep in the bath, and the dream reoccurred once again with father reminding me that there are always, ever present- worse things.

B̶u̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶a̶f̶r̶a̶i̶d̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶s̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶.̶ ̶I̶t̶'̶s̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶d̶i̶f̶f̶i̶c̶u̶l̶t̶.̶ ̶E̶v̶e̶r̶y̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶b̶r̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶t̶r̶o̶

My own mortality and failing ambitions and incomplete plans - these fears often fill my mind but none more so than the mortality of my family; to which I admit, I am ashamed to acknowledge openly to myself.

**

Mother is not doing any better. She too has not slept well since. They report to me of the nightmares and constant sobbing and screaming. I need to visit her.

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