Ryan never meant to eavesdrop. He wasn’t eavesdropping at all, if it were up to him.
But if anyone else were to see him, the way he stood hunched around the corner, hiding from a certain someone within the office Ryan had wanted to enter, everyone would think he was.
He definitely was, his ears so sharp, they listened in on every single word spoken inside that tiny office of his professor.
“Who’s that?” he whispered, his friend and classmate Mel right behind him. Tiptoeing behind Ryan’s larger frame, she tried to catch a glimpse of whomever Ryan had laid his eyes upon.
Ryan gulped, kept on staring.
Hair like silk, so shiny, and so jet-black at the same time, long enough to barely tickle his shoulders. A back straightened in confidence, a head cocked to the side in annoyance, as if none of the words spoken in the office mattered to him at all. Dainty fingers sullied by coal, paint and eraser shavings, all of it ranging up his wrists, only to disappear beneath the thin, black fabric of the turtleneck he wore.
Though he hadn’t even noticed it himself, and even if he had, Ryan would never admit to it, he was completely, and utterly … in awe. His eyes practically glittered as they gazed, endlessly, over at the stranger he’d never seen before.
Those hands, symbols of hard work, and then, such perfect, soft-looking skin near his face. A delicate body, from head to toe, and a face he hadn’t yet seen, but he was sure he’d be mesmerized by.
“That?” Mel sighed. “That’s Elias. He’s an art major. 4th year, I think.”
“Elias?”
Elias. Elias. Elias.
Forevermore, that name rolled along Ryan’s mind, and his initial objective in coming to his professor’s office was long forgotten.
“My friend Yuna had history with him, and apparently he’s a total douche. Thinks he’s better than anyone, and doesn’t bother with group projects, or anything like that. Haven’t you read the forums? The art students are always complaining about him, and how he’s so arrogant, and so full of himself—“ Mel sighed all the louder. “Okay, whatever, you’re not even listening.”
“Huh? I am, I am!” Ryan contested, staring on, still hidden around the corner.
“What the hell are you doing?” Mel asked in a confused frown, and a giggle altogether.
“I’m—“ All the quicker, Ryan straightened his back, and cleared his throat, whispering, instead, too scared of getting caught. “I wanted to see Professor Kim to ask about the upcoming exam.” Ryan cupped his hands near his mouth, as if it would amplify his voice.
“Why are we whispering?” Mel hissed right back.
Ryan scratched the back of his head, brown hair fluffing up all the more. “Well, he, Elias, he was in the office when I got there, talking to Professor Kim, and, and—“
“And?” Mel sighed. “How long have you been standing here? You even put your backpack down!”
“It was heavy!”
“Ryan. How. Long?”
“I was waiting for my turn, that’s all. Maybe, maybe … a few minutes.”
“A few minutes.”
“They had a lengthy conversation…” Ryan’s shoulders slouched, and his defense grew weaker with every single question Mel asked him.
“Right. So you decided to role-play a private detective around the corner instead of coming back another time?”
“No, no! I wasn’t listening at all! Right, I was just standing here the past, um … twenty … minutes … give or take.”
Immediately after Ryan’s admission of guilt, Mel burst out into a loud laughter. And Ryan, in a panic, pressed his extended finger onto her lips, shushing her.
“Shh! Shh! What if Elias—“
It was already too late. At the very moment Mel had laughed, mocking Ryan and his silly behavior, Elias had left Professor Kim’s office, and wished to leave the building, only to pass Ryan and Mel hidden in the corner, clearly having eavesdropped, and clearly talking about having done so.
Holy.
Crap.
Ryan stared with pupils that kept on growing, right into the eyes of the other, those brown eyes so dark, they could have been black; so beautiful and menacing all the same, terrifying Ryan into a chill down his spine, and warming him all at the same time. So endless, Ryan lost himself in them; and so reflective in their dark color, he almost saw himself in them.
Those eyes, he knew, could either save him, or kill him, and at this point, he was already so lost in trance, he could have jumped right in, willing to find out which one of the two options it was.
Those eyes are no joke.
And hostile, they were.
Ryan could no longer think clearly, and all that came out of his mouth was a mumbling, ruined mess. “I—Uh—Waiting—Professor Kim—“ Like an idiot, he pointed at the office’s door, the very room Elias had just walked out of.
Elias’ gaze followed, only to flicker right back at Ryan in a perplexed sigh. He cared little about Ryan’s existence altogether, as he already made efforts to turn away and leave.
In a panic, Ryan blew his cover completely, practically admitting he’d been eavesdropping this entire time.
“I—I can help you! E-Elias, right?” An awkward giggle crept out of him as soon as Elias snapped around to stare at him, eyes squinting in disbelief.
Ryan, chuckling with all his nerves running wild, pointed at himself. “I’m Ryan … I’m in engineering. I—I heard—no, I overheard, as I was passing by, that you were struggling with calculus. I can totally help you with that!”
Mel, standing beside her friend, was completely at a loss for words, uncertain of whether she should have laughed, or stopped him from digging his grave any deeper.
“What?” It snapped out of Elias, hitting Ryan right in the face, like an arrow meant to kill him right then and there. But at the same time, it was a voice so surprisingly soft, Ryan didn’t feel at all threatened.
“Well, I took that class last semester, and I got an A, and I still have all my notes.”
Elias glared, only to roll his eyes in a sigh, and turn away.
“W-Wait, Elias!” Ryan rushed right after him, with the both of them barely having moved two steps at a time. Ryan’s hand had reached for Elias’ wrist, only to be yanked away as soon as their skins touched, so harshly it left Ryan completely boggled.
“I never told you my name,” Elias grumbled. “Who even are you? Why would I want your help?”
“I—I just introduced myself,” Ryan pouted. “I’m Ryan! I’m in engineering, mechanical engineering, and I’m in my second year! I’ve never seen you before, but my friend over there told me your name!”
Mel squeaked when Elias’ eyes reached hers for the split of a second, as she’d been thrown under the bus by none other than one of her best friends. But Elias didn’t care much, and glared right back up at Ryan, who was oddly much taller than he was.
Ryan smiled his gleeful smile, all while rubbing his neck and adjusting the collar of his button-up shirt, which he wore over a plain-white shirt. Elias gazed up and down, and grumbled all the more, but none of the frowning, and none of the squinting ruined his face in the slightest.
His face, Ryan thought, was so perfect, and so symmetric, and so, so intense, Ryan was almost too scared to keep the eye-contact up.
“Why are you dressed like a lumberjack?” Elias suddenly asked, and Ryan flinched, as if he’d been hit by a million daggers. Staring down at himself, he tugged at his flannel, and pouted all the more, Mel behind him cracking an even louder laugh, now.
Ryan supposed his outfit couldn’t compete with Elias’ rather colorless attire, with the turtleneck so elegantly tickling along his long, petite neck, and the dark, but loose pants he wore below.
Elias was so graceful, in the way he stood, in the way he spoke, and the way he dressed. And Ryan, on the other hand … was as clumsy as man could get. He threw on whatever fit, whatever was comfortable enough … He’d never even thought about it that much, but now, he felt rather insecure about his red-and-black flannel.
“I wear this all the time,” he pouted, pulling at it, and staring down.
Elias scoffed rather quietly, wanting to leave all the quicker.
“Hold on! Don’t you need help? I heard Professor Kim mention what a hard time you were having just now. I mean, you’re in arts, so—“
Immediately, Elias’ fierce eyes hit Ryan right in the dome, making him swallow his words, his pride, and his own life, perhaps. “What, I’m in arts, so I can’t do math?”
“No! No, no, no!” Ryan crossed his hands endless times, panicking now. “Not at all! I’m just, I mean, uh—Help, I can help! That’s all, I swear! Who cares about calculus, right? I’m sure your focus is elsewhere!” He chuckled, sweat dripping off his forehead in fear.
Elias let out a bitter breath. “You are wasting my time.”
Rude, he truly was. Whether he truly was a douche, Ryan didn’t believe it just yet. A bit tone-deaf, maybe …
“At least, let me give you my number!”
“Huh?” Now, Elias frowned, disgust hitting his face like a train, and Ryan wasn’t sure whether to feel offended by it. Was it that bad, Ryan’s number in his phone?
“If you change your mind about tutoring, that is, you can just text me! Free of charge, of course, for friends and stuff!”
“We’re not friends,” Elias dryly responded.
“Well, classmates—“
“We’ve never even been in the same room together.”
“We go to the same uni, so we’re basically comrades! We should help each other out in times of need!”
Elias was completely speechless. Frozen in place, he didn’t even reach for his phone, and the hopeful glimmer in Ryan’s eyes slowly began to fade away, nothing but shame overbearing him inside out.
He hates me. He totally, totally despises me!
What did I do wrong?!
As Elias stared on, Ryan could only muster up a gulp, already drooping lower in his own sadness.
Something in Elias’ dark eyes flickered. His body tensed as he observed Ryan’s overdone reaction, and a loud click of his tongue followed, as if he’d held his breath this entire time.
“… Fine,” he hissed.
“H-Huh?”
“If you’re this stupid, I doubt you’ll be of any help in math.” Elias already held his phone towards Ryan, whose heart immediately sped up in excitement. With his green eyes all the brighter, and a smile now stuck to his face, Ryan reached for Elias’ phone, quickly typing his phone number.
Even the phone, Ryan realized, had coal, dust and all kinds of leftover of art utensils stuck to its phone case and screen. And now, he saw all the dried paint beneath his fingernails even clearer.
Elias — he worked hard, didn’t he?
“It’s Ryan. My name … is Ryan.”
But Elias had long labeled him as Ugly Flannel in the contact list, and Ryan’s lower lip protruded all the more.
“I really like this flannel…”
Elias said nothing else, not even a goodbye or talk to you later, and simply turned around, and disappeared with silent, almost ghostlike steps.
“Alright, then, you just text me whenever, Elias!” But he was long gone.
And beside Ryan, Mel slapped his shoulder, and laughed all the harder.
“What’s wrong with you?” she giggled on and on, wiping tears of joy out of her eyes, “Acting like that, and your face is all red! You know, no one is sane enough to offer Elias any help … You’ve got guts.”
“…” Ryan pouted, and didn’t fully understand what it meant. Elias’ arrogance, or his rude behavior, he had yet to see more of it, and honestly, he didn’t believe it, either.
If anything, Elias was cold. Mysterious, even.
And though Ryan hoped for a quick message from Elias, who struggled with calculus, it took more than two weeks for a call to reach his phone.
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