Jack Galaxy: Protectors of the Cookies and Cream-Flavored Toaster Pastry!
You Have Been Selected
You Have Been Selected
Oct 16, 2022
The name's Jack. I thought today would just be a normal day. So like any other day, I woke up... then fell back asleep for two hours. In all, I got a solid five hours of sleep and was ready to start the day! Oh, I don't take naps by the way. So that's the only amount of sleep I'm gonna get.
Anyway, I went to check the mail like I normally do in the morning. I was surprised to find out I had actually gotten mail this time. The letter was from a space program called Spay Sex. Apparently, that's the name of the founder. I began to read the letter:
You have been se lected for a space expe riment . .
Please go to teh beuilding next to the post off ice at Rift Plaza.
Well explain everthing.
Xoxo, Spay sex 😍😘😜😋😏
Seemed legit enough. I only looked at it once before I bolted to the plaza. The interior of Spay Sex was a bit empty, but I'm sure it was their backup headquarters. You know, for experiments like this one. There were two other people there who must've been selected. I stood between a blue-eyed chick with dark blue hair and a lifelong friend of mine. Some randomass dude explained to us what our mission was. Here's a summary: Basically we were gonna be launched deep into outer space with a cookies and cream-flavored toaster pastry. Guess we had to protect it from these Shonen-type villains or whatever. But no matter what happened, we had to bring it back to them, completely unharmed. Lot of pressure.
We met Spay Sex himself and he walked us downtown, where the main headquarters was. On its left was a mall, and on its right was a parking lot. Me and the group I was gonna be stuck with agreed that if the mission was successful, we'd all go to the mall and eat at the scammy-looking ice cream place. Then, Spay started speaking: "We will now begin the departure. Zedarnda, please step forward. I am trusting you to hold the toaster pastry during the launch." Alright, now I know her name. Guess I don't have to call her "hot girl" anymore when I'm talking to her. Zedarnda's kind of a weird name though. But then again, my friend's name starts with a 'Z.' I always catch all the Z's.
My friend was called over next, making me the last one to hop aboard. Was I nervous? Damn right I was. Even when my buddies were right there beside me. Well I've barely talked to Zedarnda, but you know. Thankfully the ship wasn't too cramped. Kind of like my bedroom, plus the three bags in front of my bed that I have packed at all times. There was a lot of food on the ship too. In fact, that's what half the ship was, just... food. And I must've eaten about half of that in a day. No one else was that hungry though. We all sat at a table by the window and just talked for a little bit. Made myself some coffee, then some for Zedarnda just to be nice... The other Z didn't want any.
We all called it a night at around the same time. Well actually, I was on my phone for another hour or so. But then I went straight to bed. The next morning according to wherever we were, we all woke up. I mean Z and Zedarnda woke up at the same time, I had been up long before then. The strange part is that we woke up on a potentially undiscovered planet, but our ship was gone. And I know we hit the sack on the ship, not some planet that felt like one. Felt like a sack, I mean. Needless to say, something was up. Me and the gang used our phones to try and contact Mr. Sex, but none of us could reach him. We weren't even sent to voice-mail, it was just pure nothingness. Even from the headquarters, no response. Then, Zedarnda received a text. It read:
Dear Jack, Z, and Zedarnda
Thanks for your money 💰🤑💸🙏👍🙂
I'm afraud you're gonna have to saty in space for a while, Im a fraud. I hope oyy devlope agood frkendships and strong ❤️💙💜💖💗💘
Love yo sincerclyu spay sex
Okay... WHAT THE HELL. "SO THIS WHOLE THING WAS A SCAM?!" I exclaimed, rightfully frustrated. I still had that letter in my pocket, so I pulled it out to have another look at it. Zedarnda and Z peered over my shoulders. I know we were all thinking the same thing: should've read it twice... That was a really advanced-looking ship though! But they probably stole it or something. Yeah, that's probably it.
Guess we just have to start our lives completely over in space. Really deep space at that. Zedarnda went wandering into a nearby forest. It looked really cool, you should've seen it. I should know, I followed her. Z was kind of just chillin' out in the open. Just then, some guy approached him and said "I'm here for your pastry." Don't know how that thing ended up in his hands, but Z refused to give it up. So by force, the mysterious man snatched it from him and booked it. Not that it matters at this point. As previously established, we have no reason to be here anymore.
A group of three individuals are sent to Deep Space with a toaster pastry that they're expected to bring back to earth in one piece. Things take a turn for the worse when they find out it was all just an elaborate scam! Now they must live in an uncharted limit of space and form an alliance that faces off against increasingly powerful villains!