Paint it RED!

TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains strong themes around abuse, depression, suicide, and was written with the intention of helping those suffering from poor mental health, and the difficulties of life, to push though and fight for better days. Sincerely, a person suffering from depression, anxiety, PTSD, with a history of self-harm (Lady Lilium)

PART 1/2

Chapter 1

Dear mother in hell. Today is the day, my first day, in this godforsaken school you insisted on me attending…. back when you were alive.

Sigh…...

‘Even in death you control my life’ Emilia sighed. ‘Such unfortunate circumstances for me.’

She reached the top of the concrete steps, seeing at last clearly now, the entrance of this new and unfamiliar school.

It looked nice, it looked really nice. The walls surrounding the property looked new, looked clean, the silver gates were open and welcoming. Upon the top of the wall itself there seemed to be shallow trays of soil, from which grew little bushes and flowers, some of which were hanging over the wall, but everything was maintained and organised.

Through the silver gates, there was a slightly curved road that led to the school a short distance away. The grounds either side of this road were large, the grass lush and green and cut-low. From where she stood, could be seen a tennis-court, a basket-ball court, and a larger building further away with a glass ceiling, that looked like it was perhaps an indoor swimming pool.

Emilia noticed then in the carpark before the front of the school, was a large and wide fountain. It was really big…. like…. you could probably fit …. twenty washing machines in this pool or something.

Emilia stared at it in surprise for a few moments, caught off-guard. There was a large statue in the centre of the pool, two dolphins leaping up playfully, water spraying from their mouths and raining down into the pool below.

The whole place was truly extraordinary, and Emilia was completely swept off her Swedish feet.

‘Ok, maybe this school isn’t so bad after all’ Emilia chuckled to herself awkwardly. ‘It’s gotta be better than my last one… anyway…. don’t let yourself be fooled Emilia!’ she beat her fist into her hand. ‘Appearances can be deceiving. Let’s remain cautious!’

‘Excuse me miss, are you alright?’

Emilia jumped out of her skin then, attention shooting towards the voice.

The woman she saw was wearing a simple green jumpsuit and heavy boots. There was dirt on her knees and elbows, and her hair was held back from her face, tied neatly in a white bandana.

A gardener?

‘You were talking to yourself’ the woman said, ‘I was just wondering if you were alright.’

Emilia stared at the woman for a few seconds, catching herself then. Her cheeks flushed red in embarrassment.

‘Oh gosh, I'm sorry’ Emilia fumbled over her words, hand going to her cheek, feeling herself getting suddenly hot. ‘I…talk to myself sometimes…. you know…when I'm nervous. I’m nervous now. I’m new….to this school I mean. This is my first day. Oh, sorry I'm rambling now…’

The gardener lifted her hand to cover her mouth as she giggled lightly.

‘It’s ok’ the lady smiled, composing herself again. ‘My name is Bootsie.’

‘Bootsie?’

‘Well…yes. My real name is actually Jessica, I have the same name as my stepsister and in the beginning, things got kinda confusing. My father began to call me Bootsie one day and it just stuck. I…always wear boots, even when I wear dresses, which isn’t often mind you. Oh, listen to me, I'm the one rambling on now.’

‘Oh no its ok!’ Emilia replied excitedly. ‘I um…my name is Emilia.’

‘Lovely.’

Emilia’s attention began to slip away then, eyes glazing over.

My mother is…. was… a devout Christian. She believes in purity, and wanted to keep me away from men until I was ‘ready’…. whatever that means. She did not want me to give into my ‘lust’, and so she sends me to this all-girls school.

‘Ha! Jokes on you mother! As it turns out, I'm a raging lesbian!’

‘You’re talking to yourself again’ Bootsie smiled sweetly.

‘Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!’ Emilia went as red as a strawberry now.

‘So, you’re a lesbian. Well, I guess you’re in a good place then’ Bootsie chuckled.

‘No that’s not what I..... I mean uh…. Sorry I get uh…. I’m such an airhead. I really do live in the clouds.’

‘You mentioned your mother’ Bootsie said. ‘Did she want you to come to this school?’

Emilia hesitated.

‘She’s dead.’

Bootsie looked shocked then, eyes wide.

‘Oh I'm…I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s ok’ Emilia shrugged nonchalantly, looking towards her own shoulder and brushing off some dust from her collar. ‘It’s kinda a relief if I'm honest.’

‘I’m sorry?’

‘She didn’t like me very much’ Emilia admitted. ‘Truth be told I don’t know why she even had me.’

‘Oh I'm…sorry to hear that…’

‘Don’t be’ Emilia interrupted.

Emilia walked past the gardener then, pausing briefly and glancing back with a smile, eyes wide with excitement.

‘Every day is a golden opportunity to better yourself’ Emilia said, ‘and to better the life of those around you. If my mother ever taught me anything, it was patience. Things can always get better.’

And with that she turned and strode away, heading towards the entrance of the school, walking with a spring in her step.

Bootsie stared after her…

‘What a strange person….’