I didn't ask for this life, but hell, it's the one I have. If I could've chosen the path that my life was going to take, I sure as freaking hell wouldn't have chosen this one, like I said. I don't want to be here right now, and well, having everyone be afraid off me right of the bat really isn't helping my anxiety in the slightest.

Just so I can clear the record though, I'm having a pretty flocking awful day at school, and well, I wasn't expecting a good one, but hell, this sets the bar for awful first days. If my tail gets stepped on just one more time, well... Let's just say that that wouldn't be good for any party involved, whether human or mammal, and, um, leave it at that.

My tail hurts like hell right now, and although I really just want to be able to point a claw-tipped finger at someone and blame them, say that it was all their fault, I can't, in all honesty, say that I blame my fellow students. You want to know why? Here it is: just like I'm so used to having to watch where mammals' tails are, humans, so it seems, don't have any, and so I'm feeling even more like a screw-up than I usually do. I'm stuck and I have nowhere to turn. Hell, I've already gone down to the principal's already (and he smells like cigar smoke, fitting for a guy with the last name Marlboro), and he made it plenty clear to both me and my lupine best friend Alaina that Earth was humans first. Seeing as I'm the outsider here, therein lies the problem. If I do anything, I'm the one with a snout and fur and tail, not the other way around.

If I do anything, I'll be the one in trouble. It comes with the territory, I suppose, but what can I do? No human's going to believe a fox, after all, so what does that say to any sane mammal?

I don't know, because I'm not entirely sane, but what I do know is that I'm really going to need to keep my muzzle shut, because it's only third period on my first day, and I've already been sent down to the principal's office once already, more times than I'd ever been back at home on Terra. I've heard plenty about human culture, and the principal is supposed to be your pal, so I've been told. As for me, though, I haven't even been able to sniff out a single lick of luck.

Add that all up, and I'm coming to realize that the Human Culture two-oh-two classes that I've taken have unfortunately neglected to teach me anything about the fact that it's apparently not acceptable to bare one's teeth at a human, probably the one thing we really needed to know.

It's been an interesting morning, to say the very least, and I already feel like I've gotten myself into a hole that's a lot harder than I'll ever be able to get out of. It hasn't been good, to put things simply, and if I had known what I was getting myself into when I signed up to be one of the first two Venturers, well, then I don't know if I would have gone for the exchange program.

Hindsight's twenty-twenty as the expression goes, but it's done now, I'm here on the humans' Earth instead of on my Terra on the other side of the Bridge that gaps the Two Worlds.

Even though I'm ticked off and in some serious flocking pain, I'm just going to have to suffer through it and hope that I don't end up with a permanent kink in my tail. From the way things are going right about now, though, well, it doesn't look good.

I can say this, at the very least: I have my friend Alaina to help me out, thank goodness, being a gray wolf apparently doesn't come with the same stereotypes as does being me, a red fox. From what I've managed to gather over the course of the last two classes (which we both have together, thank the gods), wolves are respected and honored, even treated like gods, but someone of my species? Scorn and distrust, that's all I get... I'm a good mammal, hell, even a good person, but I seem to have drawn the short straw in terms of the way humans view my species, and it's just not fair... oh, wait, I've said that already, darn it!

But here's the problem: just what the heck am I supposed to do about the fact that I'm a member of a species that everyone always automatically assumes is up to no good? Nothing, that's what, and like I said, it's not fair! I mean, I'm a fox, there's no way to change that, is there?

No, there isn't, and besides, I'm sure that these crazies will warm up to me eventually... well, I hope so... but even if they don't, well, that's nothing new.

Whether or not they actually do, though, that none of that's going to matter if I'm late to third period. If I'm being entirely honest, I think the gods are trying to play with me even more. My next class just so happens to be A and P. Let me just give you a picture here: we had that back on Terra, but that just so happens- sorry, happened- to be mammalian anatomy- foxes, wolves, leopards, the like, but in another unfortunate shortcoming of my education, it just so happens that yep, you guessed it! No human anatomy classes, and I'm going through what our first unit is going to be in real life. Yay, being a teenager sucks, get me the brain bleach please! Oh, well, I suppose, we can't be that different, can we?

Forty-Two Minutes Later

Well, I'm really starting to think that it's a good thing that I haven't had lunch yet because, well, let me just put it this way: I think I'll never think about myself in the same way. Of course... even just thinking about what I learned today... yech, it's making me start to gag...

I know that I've said it before, but I'll say it again- I had no clue what I was getting into. Maybe I should get one, because I sure as heck didn't think the first day of my new life was going to be quite like this.

Then again, I'm a newbie here and I'm still feeling kind of overwhelmed by all the hustle and bustle... well, lack thereof. Back on Terra, there were more than enough mammals in the halls at pretty much all times so that if I wanted to hide in the throngs like I really, really, really want to do right now, I could. Unfortunately for this here fox, there's no such luck right here, right now. Instead, I'm faced with the fact that I need to keep on trucking through this day, and- ow! Score another bruise for my tail, that human was too glued to whatever blue glowing thing he's holding to have seen my tail.

Yeah, I need to keep my tail up, regardless of what people are going to think because, as I was saying, I've just managed to get it stepped on for the tenth? twentieth? time today. I don't know if they said anything about it in my Human Culture classes back on Terra- they probably didn't, and even if they did, I was asleep, just my luck, military school wears on a mammal- although it's considered rude on Terra to keep one's tail up, because then people think that you're that kind of mammal (no, I'm not for sale, for flock's sake), here on Earth, keeping my tail up above its usual low droop is turning out to be somewhat of a necessity.

You know what's also a necessity? Getting lunch, because it's that time of day, oh my gods I'm hungry! I didn't get the chance to eat this morning, I was too darn worried about my first day... my host parents, the Maranzas, told me that I was going to be fine, but I couldn't find it in myself to believe them... not when I'm also supposed to be taking care of a sleeper here... don't ask me how, I'm a lover, not a fighter, and as far as I know, you can't actually kill a Sturgman.

I'm off track again, damn it... my stomach's starting to get quite ticked off at me for not feeding it. Well, I hope that they have decent food here on Earth, I've heard good things about the pizza from my fellow classmates, who, for all their ignorance in regards to my tail, are actually turning out to be decent people.

Just thirty more seconds to until the end of class... gods I can't wait!

As soon as the bell rings, I spring forwards out of my seat and dash for the door to leave, only to have the teacher, Mrs. Maple, stop my flight just as I'm about to step out into the hall.

"Can you wait here for just a minute, Theo?" she asks, pointing a finger back at my seat.

Confused but unwilling to take any more chances today, I do as I'm told and slump into my chair, chiding myself all the while in my head for screwing up again and, as I feel my ears flatten against my skull in shame, I hate myself.

Bad fox, I think. Colossal screw up freak fox, just like always. Run away like the mess you are, you flock-up!

"Alright, you win, I'll stay," I say, trying and failing to keep the whimper out of my voice and seriously hating that it's there in the first place. "But in all seriousness, what did I do wrong, Mrs. Maple?"

"Theo, calm down, you didn't do anything, alright? I just want to let you know something before you go, yeah?"

"And what's that?" I ask, hoping she'll just let me go. I don't need to be in trouble again, and I haven't eaten all morning; I'm hungry. Life likes to play games though, and instead of letting me go, she puts a paw- hand, rather, I'm always mixing the two up- on my shoulder, and I'm thankful that she's not angry with me. I really don't need another person rubbed the wrong way by a walking, talking fox (aka me), because all I've been discovering over the course of the past few hours is that all the preparation I've done throughout the last fifteen years of my life has come to nothing... except for my complete inability to save myself pain and frustration... to be a student here on Earth, you have to be able to roll with the punches. That's a little different than ducking out of the way of flying glass bottles... maybe it's just me, but I'm always afraid that something or someone's going to come after me, and I can see just how screwed up of a mammal I am, a fox that's slightly off my rocker.

"Look, Theo, I know it's hard, but please, for your sake, don't let them get you down, alright?" Mrs. Maple asks, giving me the pitying look that my mother would give me after she got over being drunk and then came to realize what she did (Usually hit me with the bottle or aim for my head if I was farther away... thanks for dying, dad, I really miss ya.). "Look, Theo, I know you're probably not going to want to tell me or not, but I'm a mother, I have two kids of my own- you've had a rough day, haven't you? Your fur's all ruffled up, your tail is sticking straight out behind you, and you look like you're wearing a mink collar," Mrs. Maple says, looking at me with compassionate eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, not seeing any minks and then having to shake my head. It's an expression, I realize, of course I didn't get it... why can't I get it? Oh, that's why- I'm so used to having to take everything literally or probably dying that sarcasm, whoosh, flies right over my head.

"You don't know?" she asks, looking confused.

"No," I say, "I don't. Sorry, please, fill me in."

"Here on Earth, Theo," Mrs. Maple says, "animals never rose to sentience like they did on the other side of the Bridge."

"Well, yeah, duh," I say, wondering why she'd think that I wouldn't know that. I may not know a whole awful lot of things about human culture, but of freaking course I know that animals never rose to sentience on Earth like they did on Terra, doesn't everyone? "What makes you think I wouldn't know?"

"Here's why, Theo," she says, "on Earth, mammals are killed for their fur, coats,the collars of coats...." Noticing the look of absolute horror and disgust on my face, she smiles apologetically. "You didn't know?"

"I guess not, Mrs. Maple," I whimper. Foolish fox. Screwup fox. And you think you can do this?

Feeling foolish for being so arrogant and feeling my hackles rise in bitter anger for the who-knows-how-manyeth time that day, I try to make it up to her. "No, I didn't know, you're right, I was wrong. Now, if you'll please let me go to lunch, I'm starving." With that, I snatch my tail up so that way no more idiots will step on it, and try to find my way to the cafeteria. I have no idea where it is, but I can smell it.

I follow my nose until I come to the cafeteria doorway, and go find my way to the end of the line, and I'm almost into the serving line when a gruff baritone voice comes from behind me and over my head.

"Well, fox, ready to die?"

I turn around and gulp, because the human who I'm now facing is over two paws taller than me, and he doesn't look too happy... what the hell did I do wrong, you guys, what did I do wrong?

"Uh...hi?" I manage to yip out. "How are ya?"

In lieu of an answer, he picks me up by my arms, and before I can react, I'm sailing through the air, and that doesn't quite register until I crash into Alaina's lunch table. As I pick myself up, I notice that everyone's staring at me, and I can't fight the fear from my heart.

Oh, sheep dip, I think. Well, I'm flocking screwed.

As if I've summoned him out of thin air (hell, he might've actually done just that), the lunch monitor comes over to the table off of which I'm picking myself up, and from the look on his face, I'm going to be the one in trouble, not the asshole who chucked me over here, oh no no, of course not.

Yeah, that seems about right, seeing as this planet just seems to hate me. I can't seem to understand why, though, I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

The lunch monitor doesn't say anything else to me, only points his finger at my battered self, and then points out the door. "You," he says. "Fox. Troublemaker. Get out and I don't want to see you again. I think you know where you need go."

"But-," I try to protest, but the monitor cuts me off, adding a glob of spit to the end of the argument, and in that split second I decide that I don't want to risk it... scat, what am I doing wrong here I just want to cry no don't cry you messup.

Once again, this world has shown me just how different it is from what I thought it would be... I don't quite know what I was hoping for, maybe just to escape from some of the stereotypes if I just acted like as a human as I could, but no such luck. I don't want to push it with this guy, so I decide to just do what I'm told and head out of the cafeteria, tail between my legs, and ears splayed flat against the top of my head for the second time in just under four and a half hours.

It's an endless walk from the cafeteria to the principal's office, and thankfully (not), I already know the way there. Of course, the food that's clinging to my fur and clothes isn't helping anything- each and every single person that I pass by on my journey down the hallway gives me a wide-eyed stare, as if they can't understand why I'm covered in spaghetti sauce and bread crumbs, why I have tears running down my face no don't cry you freak.

I don't understand how they can't show me some sympathy, not with all the pains in the tail that this building seems to serve as a haven for, but whatever. They can go flock themselves, for all I care.