At long last, I had reached the lecture hall. Twenty minutes earlier than everyone else, of course.

Like the Minotaur I was, after two years of getting lost in this labyrinthine campus, I had finally learned to traverse it; or at least make time for getting lost by setting out super early.

And now, like a true future Honors student, I was here before anyone else. Excessively so, even. But if I wanted to survive in this hellscape long enough to get an internship, I'd need to crush my "peers" (rivals) with punctuality and sheer fucking diligence.

I glanced around the empty lecture hall and relished in the absence of any other soul, before trotting down the aisle.

As I neared the summit that was the front row, I stretched out my arms behind my head until I heard a satisfying crackle, then promptly shoved a finger in my nose.

Basic hygiene.

If I was going to be an Honors student, I had to keep up appearances. Just... only in front of others. I was well within my rights to be a pig in an empty lecture hall.

Hopping off the last stair, I slumped into my usual seat – front row, just by the aisle - and splayed my right arm across the desk of the next, before immediately recoiling.

'Eww, what the fuck!' I screamed and shot up in my seat as a silky matt of fur tickled my hand.

Had someone left their therapy animal in the theatre? I winced, too afraid to confront the mass that brushed me.

I pulled my gaze to meet the oddly familiar death glare of a young woman, likely around my age. Her cheek was pressed against the cool desk, and her mop of golden hair carpeted it like spilled Coke.

It was clear that she had just woken up, and was not happy about my intrusion.

'Pick a winner, Allie?' she smirked, face still glued to her desk as she judged me with those swampy blue-green eyes.

My face flushed deep red, and I nervously brushed my upper lip with a finger, as if to pass off my earlier activities as "itching my nose."

'Oh, fuck off, bowl-cut,' I grumbled with a scowl, deflating into my seat.

Anyone. Anyone but this fucking bitch. I'd rather be seated next to some dude on a watchlist than this toad-stool. And I say that internally with a hyphen because I am referring to amphibian feces.

Shit, she even remembered my name. What had it been, like six years? Seven?

I was hoping if I ever ran into her again she wouldn't recognize me, but I was a college student, so plastic surgery was out of the question. So, reliance on the faulty memory of a genius? Yup, let's go with that.

'So... Tally Hall, what brings your ugly mug this side of the campus?' I questioned, arms crossed as I woman-spread in my chair, slouched and looking anywhere but her way.

'Starting my first year of the Departmental Honors Program of Advanced Chemistry, you? Guessing you walked into the wrong lecture hall 102B, there is one on either side of the campus, Al-duh~' she snickered, elongating the "da" of my name with a certain stupidity I only assumed natural for her.

I was about ready to sock her one, but gently unclenched my hands as I took an imperceptible deep breath. Appearances, Al, appearances.

'You are such a child, Talyn,' I affected, crossing my arms and slowly shaking my head as I straightened up like a high-strung aristocrat.

'Oh, Alda, I've no idea what you mean,' she feigned innocence, before stomping on my foot beneath our desks.

Wincing but not conceding an ounce of pain, I briefly surveyed the hall and noticed students gradually spilling in as the professor prepared his PowerPoint presentation.

● ● ●

I swear, first lecture of the day and I was already poised to pass out.

Just having that witch next to me put me on edge.

I felt like a paranoid emperor side-eyeing one of his conniving eunuchs. I just couldn't prove my chalice was poisoned, yet.

I could not leave my throne, or else she would have won the battle, suffocating me with her air of superiority.

I just had to latch onto the slim chance that Tal hadn't jumped at the opportunity to select her classes the second applications had opened, or else the thought of us being in constant forced proximity would kill me.

'Aight, ciao, gringo,' I chirped at the swamp-eyed hag as I pulled myself up from my seat, slinging my laptop bag over my shoulder.

First lecture was over, so I had around about half an hour to stuff my face before skedaddling to the next.

● ● ●

After making one crucial stop, I made my way into the mess hall, surveying the area for an unoccupied table. It was then that a twinkly wave flickered into my periphery, evidently addressing me. Probably the only person in this campus who would.

'Allie! Allie! Allie~' a shrill voice cried from a bobbing purple mass at a table by the window. God, I hated when people called me that, but it was at least better than "Weird Al," which kids called me for the majority of my later school years.

'Hey, Kelz,' I mumbled as I placed a large-sized bucket of Popeye's chicken on the table, pulled a leg out and slumped into a chair. I tore off a chunk and chewed it slowly, spacing out.

'Popeye's chicken is fucking awesome...' I referenced absently, still chewing the same bite. It was at this moment that Kelsie stretched her neck to look around my bucket, one pierced eyebrow raised in concern.

'You good, Allie? Usually you're down half a bucket by now,' the purple pigtails bobbled as she spoke. 'Also, you only have a large bucket of Popeye's before a major exam, and the semester just started,' she stated matter-of-factly, eyes closed, and index finger held up as if she were reaching some conclusion.

She was in humanities, but it was history, not psychology. This level of psychoanalysis was just unhealthy, and had nothing to with her major.

'And you didn't even attempt an Adam Sandler impression, seriously, girl, what's up?' the purple-headed one asked, adjusting her rectangular wire-framed glasses before she glared at me. Obviously trying to soul-read, again, or so she called it.

'Ooh, how about a guessing game~' she chirruped with a clap. 'You say a band name, I'll soul-read you,' she explained, and who was I to say no. Something to do, and her dark eyes were practically sparkling like a puppy's beneath those glasses.

'Uh, what? Fine... Nirvana?' I murmured.

'About a girl,' she replied swiftly.

'Uh, is Gotye a band?' I asked in a daze.

'Somebody that I used to know!' she shot, pigtails bouncing as she finger-gunned at me.

'System of a Down, Weezer, American Football! Take that!' I exclaimed with a vicious point.

'Science, say it ain't so, graduation,' she guessed correctly. Shit, she was good.

'Fuck you,' I replied curtly, and went silent as I allowed her to spin her own conclusion.

'Ok, so, what I can gauge is that there's a girl in your program who you used to know from school. An ex?' she proposed, actually getting kind of close.

'No, ew. Not my type, but go on,' I interrupted, sticking a finger in my throat in attempt to gag.

'Mhm. You were both science overachievers, something bad happened, then you graduated and never saw each other until now. And you "didn't" date,' she continued, and yeah, she was spot on. If Kelsie had to guess a song to describe herself, it'd be one word and by Radiohead.

'Eh, close enough, and we didn't. If you were gay, you'd be my type. Stacked, multicolored hair, and piercings~' I said with a growl, and my gaze drifted to a familiar figure across the hall.

'I've tried enough gay hypnosis vids, keep dreaming... Hey, is that her or are you just eyeing up another rando?' she giggled, raising her eyebrows at me.

As my gaze shifted to the crone's face, our eyes locked. Those piercing eyes suddenly became wide and flustered, and she swiftly slid herself into a seat on the other side of the hall. Weird.

'She is hot! You lied! I'm straight and even I can tell you she's pretty!' she berated me, and I could feel myself sinking into my chair.

'Hey, you've never called me hot,' I sulked, curling up with my chicken leg while keeping an eye on Talyn. 'She's not even that cute...' I grumbled defiantly, my gaze tracking her every movement.

'The lady doth protest too much~' Kelsie teased with a theatrical tone. What the hell did that mean?

'Lemme just-' Kelsie sprung up from her chair and scuttled over to the blondie. Oh, no. What are you doing? Please, don't. Ugh.

Head in hands, I peered over to the beauty, crouched down and whispering into the beast's ear. I really, really felt like crawling into a hole and dying. I groaned into my hands.

From my cave of solitude, my ears burned red as I glimpsed Kelsie pointing right at me, grinning like an idiot as she held up a peace sign or "scissor" to Talyn. No, two. What the fuck was she doing?

She proceeded to intertwine both peace signs. Smooth, real smooth, Kelz.

I noted Talyn looked utterly dumbfounded, repulsed even. Her face was scrunched up and I didn't need to know how to read lips to know she had repeatedly asked the questions "what the fuck are you talking about?" and "do I know you?" to no avail.

Frankly, I would not wish this fate upon even Talyn.

'Don't listen to a thing she says, she's insane,' I mouthed at her, swirling my finger by the side of my head and shaking it vigorously. Talyn met my gaze with a slow blink, clearly just as mortified as I was.

Hey, I'd dig her grave if she dug mine.

As I watched the exchange in horror from afar, I noted I was down three fourths of my chicken bucket. Damn, she had better get this over with before I run out of grease and implode from embarrassment.

It was then that the purple-haired fairy pranced over, and I met her re-entry with a smoldering glare.

'What in the fuck was that?' I interrogated, glancing over at Kelsie's victim who still seemed utterly stunned. I honestly could not blame her.

'Oh, never you mind~' she giggled, and I was about ready to rip those pigtails off her pretty head. Noting my hands unconsciously miming the very assault, Kelsie grinned and threw up her interlocking scissors hand sign.

And with that, I tore through my remaining Popeye's chicken.