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Thank You for Calling Customer Service

Rise and Shine

Rise and Shine

Aug 05, 2022

A loud roar came from my gnome alarm sitting on my nightstand. I reached over and patted the little guy on the head, feeling his soft, wispy white hair between my fingers. Glauber stood only eight inches tall, but he roared like a dragon. Glauber rubbed his eyes and then let out a huge yawn. His round belly strained against his red work vest. “Have a good day at work, Kevin! I'm going back to sleep.” Glauber said. Adjusting his pointed red cap, he walked over to the bed I set up for him on my nightstand. Getting under the covers, he curled up in the tiny cushioned bed. Glauber's eyes closed, and his miniature snores made for low white noise filling the room.

“Thanks Glauber, but I would rather work from home like you.” I said, rolling out of bed. Glauber chuckled a little, then quickly went back to snoring. I grabbed my wand next to him and groaned as I stood up. Waving the wand, my shirt and pants flew out of my closet and followed me into the bathroom as I showered. 

Once dry, I summoned my clothes from their invisible hangers in the air. Sitting on the toilet, my pants flew onto my legs, then buttoned themselves. when I stood up, my shirt put itself onto me one sleeve at a time and the buttons buttoning themselves and finally my shirt tucked into my pants. When I opened the bathroom door, my tie and belt flew over with my tie, wrapping its self around my neck weaving into formation as my belt fashioned it around my waist.

Looking over to the bathroom mirror, I flicked of my wand starting my usual monotonous morning routine into its familiar dance - the toothpaste tube pirouetted up like a cobra, dispensed a perfect ribbon onto my brush, then slithered back to its spot. While my enchanted toothbrush worked its magic, cleaning my mouth. I smoothed argan oil through my damp hair. As I looked in the mirror, I could see the bags under my eyes getting worse. I spit into the sink, then watched as a warm washcloth drifted over to clean my face. When it floated away, I stared at my reflection, still wearing yesterday's frown. Thank God it's Friday.

Now dressed and clean, I walked over to the kitchen and waved my wand again. From the fridge, two eggs floated out. They cracked themselves on the counter and then dropped the contents into a pan with a fire lit underneath. The eggs scrambled themselves. After cooking, they slid onto a plate. The plate with a fork and glass of water floated over to me at the table, sitting down in front of me.

When I finished my breakfast, I waved my wand again. This time my wizard hat floated over. It sat on top of my head. But instead of standing straight in the air, it drooped over sadly. With a sigh, I teleported to work. 

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Kai Willow

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Kevin is working in a dead-end job in a magic call center. He can clearly handle any situation thrown his way, but for some reason, he cannot be promoted to Master Customer Service Wizard. But after an insane call with goblins raiding a town, Kevin approaches the Grandmaster Customer Service Wizard one more time to get his promotion, hopefully.

This short story is a part of the Monarch of Sorcery short story collection sold on Amazon or where ever you purchase books.
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Rise and Shine

Rise and Shine

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