"I just don't see her as a woman. I don't think I could ever like her like that."

I froze outside the double doors that led to the suite bedroom.

A sigh of relief. "Good. I'm sorry if I'm putting you on the spot. It's just I can't help but feel a bit insecure about the whole situation. She's just so perfectly adorable, don't you think?"

This time a clear, mirthful laugh rung out into the hall. "You can say that."

I knew since the day he popped the question that he didn't love me, but a small part of me, deep down in my chest, hoped that maybe one day he would grow to love me. As today's date approached and the preparations finished up, my fantasies only amplified. So now with a heavy heart and a painful lump in my throat, I tiptoed back to the suite entrance to approach the bedroom once again, making as much noise as I could to announce my arrival.

The bedroom doors swung open, and I dramatically slouched over with my hands on my knees, breathing heavily.

"Now, now. Why is our bride-to-be out of breath?"

I let an eyeless smile split my face. "Oh there you are, Eleanor. I've been looking for my pills. I remember leaving my personal bag with you this morning."

"Yes! I have it right here!" Eleanor reached behind the armchair she perched on and pulled out my black Chanel.

"Thank you so much! I haven't eaten anything all morning, and the fatigue is finally getting to me. By the way, do you have water?"

"Wait, what pills?" James leans back into his chair with his arms crossed and a wary look in his eyes.

I smiled naively, picking up the tiny pill from the bottle cap and washing it down with a dainty sip. The pills were appetite suppressants, but they were also suppressants in general, which was a godsend after the conversation I had just overheard. Maybe I was imagining it, but I immediately felt a fog dampening the hurt in my heart. "Your aunt recommended them to me after that first dress fitting. I must say they've helped tremendously with the diet."

I handed the water and the bag back to Eleanor while I pretended not to see James clenching his jaw out of the corner of my eye. We've never discussed my eating habits before because he doesn't believe it's his place to say anything, but I know it bothered him to no end whenever I pretended I thought I was too fat. In actuality, I just had a bad habit of destroying my body whenever I felt helpless. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that he'd leave after this to go find out which aunt recommended the pills to me. Joke's on him, though, because I'd using these since university.

"It's such a shame you won't be able to stay for the ceremony, Eleanor. I'm going to be lonely without you." That part wasn't a lie. Being James's real lover, Eleanor was the only other person who knew the marriage was fake, and as much as I wanted to resent her, it felt comforting to know that I could talk to someone if it ever got too overwhelming. "When are you leaving for the airport again?" I asked. "Can you please drop by my fitting room before you go? I want to say good-bye, and you can drop off my things then, too."

"I can't believe you're not staying for the reception. Who are you, and where did you put Eleanor? I mean, Justin is DJing, so there's guaranteed to be a whole hour of straight 2000s music."

Eleanor crossed her arms and sneered. "Oh shut up. We all know I'm skipping because I won't be able to stand my jealousy when I see you two on that stage together!"

The silence and guilt seeped into my bones and sent prickles down my spine. Both James and I stared at her, but her eyes were turned down at the floor, embarrassed by her outburst. James was first to reach out and pull her into a hug.

"I'm sorry, Eleanor," I said, "I didn't even consider-- I didn't think you'd feel that way."

Eleanor shook her head and untangled herself out of James's arms with a sad smile. "Don't worry about me, guys. I'll be okay. Just have fun today. I'll see you again soon."

"Are you sure, babe?"

Eleanor nodded. "Actually, my brother's probably going to be here in fifteen minutes, and I still need to go back to my dad's room to get my suitcase. Let's say our farewells now, and James can walk you back to your fitting room."

I pouted as we both squeezed Eleanor as tight as we could. "Have fun in Seattle, okay?" I said. "Don't smoke too much weed. We want you back in one piece."

"And don't forget to visit Bruce Lee while you're there. Take lots of pictures for me. I miss my real dad."

Eleanor giggled, a real smile stretching across her face now. She would be back by the time James and I got back from our honeymoon, but where's the fun if you don't pretend you'll be separated for years?

"Write often!" James yells. Eleanor sticks her head through the doors one last time with a thumbs up before shutting them with a click.

"How was the sleepover last night?" I asked as we strolled down the carpeted hotel corridor. "I heard Khoa nearly fell off the stairs."

James made a face. "Not nearly. He did. He just didn't break anything thankfully. How about you?"

My turn to cringe. "They got me stripper cops. I tried to stay sober because I didn't want a hangover today, but I couldn't take it. My head is still pounding."

"We sure know how to pick them. Isn't it unethical to buy strippers the night before the wedding?"

"I'll say. The ones at the bachelorette party were enough to last me a lifetime anyways."

"If I'd known this would happen, I would've scheduled the rehearsal dinner later. I just wanted them to go to sleep! Is that too much to ask?"

"I think our friends are too young for us, James."

"Claira, you're literally 26."

"I am 62 at heart."

"That would make this marriage unethical."

"Says who? You act like a retiree, too, Mister Oatmeal-and-crosswords-for-breakfast!"

"That does not make me old!"

"Only people without teeth like oatmeal."

"We're breaking up, Claira. It's not me; it's you,"

I shrugged. "Then I guess the wedding's off. See you never."

James held the fitting room door open for me, lips pressed together to suppress his smile. "Bye, loser."

I grinned.