Content warning: This series contains a lot of sex, especially chapter 1 (Awake). It's also primarily about feelings and character relationships. If those things turn you off, it's probably not for you. ❤️ Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

  Violet’s thoughts wandered as she bobbed her head up and down. A slight pang of hunger drew her mind to breakfast, which she didn’t usually eat but found herself trying to account for in this morning’s rapidly evaporating budget. What would she wear to work? The flower-patterned sweater on the floor beside her had only been worn a few hours yesterday. That’d be fine. Same for the torn, black jeans she knew were somewhere nearby.

  I really need to keep more clothes here.

  Ryan grunted sleepily on the bed in front of her. He was fine. Cute, actually, but they’d only been seeing each other for a few weeks and their routine was already becoming a little too predictable. It probably wasn’t his fault. Was being easy to please a bad thing?

  Probably not. I just get bored too easily.

  Violet considered the blowjob she was currently giving him. She’d started it. Well, he’d already had the erection, but she was feeling particularly needy and had hoped her teasing would lead to something more. Instead, he’d been content to enjoy the attention and drift back into half-sleep, leaving her the frustrated and teased one.

  We just had sex last night, she thought. Why am I so horny lately?

  She’d then teased him lightly with her fingers until a half awake hand pushed down on her shoulder. She knew what that meant. Blowjobs were his favorite, and she’d felt bad stopping there. So now she was going down on him, again. Hoping it would lead to what she wanted, again. Knowing it probably wouldn’t. Knowing she’d need to hurry out the door right after he finished to have any shot at getting to work on time. And she knew he’d most likely be too sleepy to reciprocate anyway.

  Fuck. It’s just a blowjob, and I started it. I’m overthinking thi–

  Ryan was about to cum. She’d known it would only take a few more minutes back when her thoughts first began to wander to work and breakfast, but this was somehow more vivid, as though she could feel the sharp burst of pleasure rushing into him. Her eyes opened wide with surprise. She could feel it. A flash of tense heat about to explode between her legs. No– Ryan’s legs? That didn’t make sen–

  She almost choked when he hit the back of her throat, snapping her attention back to her mouth. Violet was careful not to pull completely off of him before he was done. She didn’t have time to clean cum out of her hair.

  “Woah, you okay?”, Ryan asked, sitting up with a start.

  Violet was already hurrying to the bathroom. She barely avoided stumbling on the clothes scattered across the floor.

  “Mmn,” she replied after swallowing again, then turned on the faucet.

  What the fuck was that? Did I just get off giving head? Is that even possible?

  Violet paused a moment to breathe, looking at her messy morning hair. She’d heard of people who were able to bring themselves to orgasm just by thinking about it, but she’d actively not been thinking about it. Surely that kind of thing took deliberate focus. And it had felt so strange compared to her usual orgasms. But also good, for that brief moment.

  “Fuck, I’m going to be late,” she sighed.

  Moments later she was closing the apartment door behind her and rushing down the stairs, leaving Ryan in his bed. Her thoughts raced, but she had trouble focusing on any particular topic. Not unusual for a stress-fueled power walk to the bus stop. She could probably still make it to work on time. If the bus was on time. And she didn’t miss it. Maybe Anne — her boss — would be busy stocking something in the back and not notice exactly when she arrived. At least she wasn’t feeling quite as hungry as she’d thought. There wouldn’t have been time to eat anyway.

  She felt a little guilty about where her thoughts had been earlier. It wasn’t that he never reciprocated, just not as often as she wanted, and her want was nearly constant these last few days. Still, she was frustrated the morning hadn’t gone as she’d initially hoped, not to mention confused about whatever had happened right at the end. Whatever it was, it had left a warm, tingling sensation on her skin, an odd but very pleasant feeling that was in complete contrast to her conflicted thoughts.

  “Think you can handle this all on your own?” Violet asked Kate dryly.

  The redhead in a matching black apron rolled her eyes and continued reading her book. Violet grinned and turned to the counter to log the start of her lunch break. Violet had regretted skipping breakfast within an hour of arriving at work, but nothing in the display looked appetizing. She hung up her apron and exited the empty cafe in the direction of a place called Al’s across the street.

  It had been a painfully slow morning, but at least Anne had decided things were slow enough she could go run a few errands, leaving Kate and Violet to handle the rest of the afternoon. Anne was nice enough, as bosses went, but she did own Café Rose and always seemed to find little chores that needed to be done no matter how slow things got. And Violet liked Kate, so it was shaping up to be a very chill shift.

  A few minutes later, Violet found an isolated seat against the front window of Al’s, two slices of pepperoni pizza in hand. Her pizza didn’t look particularly appetizing either, now that it was sitting in front of her, but she picked up one of the slices with the intention of taking a bite anyway. Her thoughts kept drifting back to that morning. Hadn’t she just been complaining about how boring things with Ryan had gotten? Why couldn’t she stop thinking about it? Why had it felt so strange, and so good? Maybe Ryan would want to have sex again before leaving for his evening shift at the bar.

  The tip of the pizza slice she’d been holding near her mouth was drooping, the cheese starting to separate and slide off, pepperoni and all. She hastily set it back down and reached for her phone with her other hand.

  “Will you be home this afternoon? Hoping to see you before your shift”

  She stared at the outgoing text until it flipped to “read” a few seconds later. Again, Violet lifted her slice of pizza for a bite, grimaced, and set it back down. Her insides ached and her body felt hot. Why did she feel like she’d be sick each time she went for a bite? The pizza smelled amazing, and Al’s had always hit the spot before, even if the pepperoni was a slightly guilty indulgence. She stared intently into the greasy shimmer of one of the toasted pepperoni cups until her phone buzzed.

  “Someone’s insatiable lately :P” Ryan’s reply teased.

  He was teasing, right? Or was she freaking him out? She hadn’t even mentioned sex directly. That was probably a bad sign. Once or twice a day was normal for new relationships, right? Though, they were actually having a lot more sex this week than when they first started seeing each other, and nearly all of it lately had been started by her. God, what she wouldn’t give to be choking on him right now. Or anyone, really. Surprised by her own thoughts, Violet blinked. She’d been staring through her pizza at nothing and very nearly drooling. She closed her mouth and swallowed, then grabbed a small to-go box and started back to the cafe.

  The gusts of cool, October air catching her frizzy, brown hair and rushing across her neck were a welcome relief. Her skin still felt like it was radiating. As she reached for the cafe door, however, she froze. Her inner thigh felt damp and cold in the breeze. She knew she’d gotten a bit turned on spacing out a few minutes ago but this seemed excessive. She felt the flush heat on her cheeks intensify, this time from embarrassment. Pulling open the door and avoiding Kate’s gaze, she rushed into the back of the cafe to drop her box on the counter, then backtracked to the restroom. As she closed the door, she caught a brief glimpse of her own concern mirrored on Kate’s face.

  After hanging her coat and purse on the hook on the inside of the bathroom door, Violet unbuttoned her jeans and pushed them down. The clear, slippery threads hanging from her to her underwear relieved her of two of her fears — that she’d somehow peed herself or suddenly started bleeding down her leg. That relief quickly faded back to embarrassment, however. She couldn’t remember ever being this wet before. Her underwear was drenched, the inner thigh of her jeans was beginning to match, and the throbbing inside her continued despite having abandoned her fantasies at the pizza shop. She wondered if this could be a normal reaction to daydreaming blowjobs while staring vacantly at pizza.

  Maybe, but it’s certainly not normal for me, she concluded as a bead of the translucent liquid began to drip from her to the underwear a few inches below.

  Instinctively she caught it with her fingers, pausing a moment to watch it spread as she slowly rubbed her glistening fingers together. She raised her hand up to her lips and licked, inhaling softly. She shivered, feeling an even more intense warmth spread from her tongue to her lips, then over her whole body, leaving behind a tingling sensation.

  She wanted to cum so badly. Needed to. Needed to press something against the growing heat inside her. Her whole body trembled with anticipation as she realized what she was about to do. She moved her hand down again, pressing against the soft, slippery skin between her legs as her dripping fingers slid forward and back, then in. A small moan escaped her lips as she squeezed her fingers toward her palm, gently pressing against her insides.

  Violet continued, in and out, a little faster and deeper each time. She leaned against the wall for support, shaking knees making it difficult to continue standing. It felt incredible, each sensation familiar, of course, yet somehow more intense than ever before. Each flash of pleasure echoed through her body, adding to those that came before it, until everything else faded away. Her whole body tensed and trembled, a brief squeak escaping her lips as the twitching of her body fought her resolve to keep from being heard. By the time the waves subsided she was nearly on the floor, still trembling. Slowly, she raised her dripping hand and slid her fingers into her mouth again.

  Holy fuck, that felt good. And why do I smell so good? What the fuck is wrong with me?

  For several minutes she continued to awkwardly squat there, basking in the warm, tingling afterglow of her orgasm. She was vaguely aware she was still dripping, now onto the floor, but she couldn’t bring herself to do anything about it yet. Everything was already soaked anyway. Her body still ached with an inexplicable need for — something. She had no idea what. Clearly not pizza or getting off in her work bathroom, even if it had felt incredible.

  Oh god, I have to get up.

  Knock knock — “Vi, you in there?”

  “Y– Yeah.”

  “You know we only have one restroom… You okay?”

  “I– I’m fine,” Violet tried to sound normal tired or sick tired and not I-just-had-the-best-nut-of-my-life tired. “Kate?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I think I need to go home early today. I– I guess lunch isn’t agreeing with me.”

  “Oh, yeah, sure, I got you,” Kate replied.

  Thank god for Kate.