Joined Jul 2020 Japan
I'm a Japanese lesbian and I'm studying English by reading GL novels. I'm happy to have found so many great novels. Thank you.
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#003 Taken October 2015.
The first time I fell in love with a girl was when I was in elementary school. But at the time, I never dreamed that I was in love with her.
I thought that the reason I enjoyed being with her and thought about her all the time was because I had strong feelings for her as a friend more than anyone else.
Because I thought that love and marriage with someone of the opposite sex was the norm, and that it couldn't and shouldn't be between girls.
When I was 24 years old, I had my first girlfriend. I came out to my mother for the first time in a letter to her when she cried and said, "I want to marry you and I want you to tell your parents," and I did.
A few days later, my mother told me that she didn't understand it at all.
It was a huge shock to me and her, and from then on, our relationship, work, and everything else started to go wrong, and we ended up breaking up.
I lost my mental balance, became depressed and blamed myself for six months.
I couldn't open up to my family, I couldn't love myself, and I felt like I was in a tunnel with no way out anywhere.
（1/2, continued on next page）
The first time I fell in love with a girl was when I was in elementary school. But at the time, I never dreamed that I was in love with her.
I thought that the reason I enjoyed being with her and thought about her all the time was because I had strong feelings for her as a friend more than anyone else.
Because I thought that love and marriage with someone of the opposite sex was the norm, and that it couldn't and shouldn't be between girls.
When I was 24 years old, I had my first girlfriend. I came out to my mother for the first time in a letter to her when she cried and said, "I want to marry you and I want you to tell your parents," and I did.
A few days later, my mother told me that she didn't understand it at all.
It was a huge shock to me and her, and from then on, our relationship, work, and everything else started to go wrong, and we ended up breaking up.
I lost my mental balance, became depressed and blamed myself for six months.
I couldn't open up to my family, I couldn't love myself, and I felt like I was in a tunnel with no way out anywhere.
（1/2, continued on next page）
（2/2）
Six months passed and I met a girlfriend who changed my life.
She smiled and told everyone, whether it was family or friends, that she was gay. When she said it, it was as if being gay was nothing to her.
She was a light to me.
I want to live like her. I want to love myself as I am and be proud of it. That's why I had the courage to come out to the people around me.
The joy of having my loved ones accept me for who I am is great, and as I come out to them more and more, I am able to forgive and love myself more and more.
The more I loved myself, the more the world in front of me was transformed into a kinder and more loving place for me.
Coming out is an important form of self-expression and self-acceptance for me, and it is also an opportunity for me to discover a lot of love.
Through OUT IN JAPAN, I hope that as many people as possible can have hope for the future and take an important step forward with courage.
With love, gratitude and blessings to all the people with whom we are connected.
Ayase
（Photographer Leslie Kee took this picture for me.）
http://outinjapan.com/ayase-kunikiyo/
Six months passed and I met a girlfriend who changed my life.
She smiled and told everyone, whether it was family or friends, that she was gay. When she said it, it was as if being gay was nothing to her.
She was a light to me.
I want to live like her. I want to love myself as I am and be proud of it. That's why I had the courage to come out to the people around me.
The joy of having my loved ones accept me for who I am is great, and as I come out to them more and more, I am able to forgive and love myself more and more.
The more I loved myself, the more the world in front of me was transformed into a kinder and more loving place for me.
Coming out is an important form of self-expression and self-acceptance for me, and it is also an opportunity for me to discover a lot of love.
Through OUT IN JAPAN, I hope that as many people as possible can have hope for the future and take an important step forward with courage.
With love, gratitude and blessings to all the people with whom we are connected.
Ayase
（Photographer Leslie Kee took this picture for me.）
http://outinjapan.com/ayase-kunikiyo/
