Doctor Horadi is a very proficient child psychologist and mother of four; she works her way through school as a single parent after her wife’s untimely death, and her hard work pays off daily. She has a nice home, food to feed her children, money to buy them toys, and an undaunted sense of pride.
She has helped many young souls discover who they are, what they could be, and has taught them how to leave their demons behind. Her children are grown now, she has found new love, and her practice is booming.
When she meets Clover Lee, her pride shatters.
“Clover?”
The young girl, with hair shaped into a wonderful puff that compliments her dark skin, slides from her seat. A tall woman with high cheekbones takes Clover's hand and smiles, but the worry dances in her eyes.
“I’m Doctor Horadi,” the doctor introduces herself. “Your mom said you need someone to talk to, and I’m very fun to talk to.” Doctor Horadi smiles genuinely, warmly, at Clover, who smiles shyly back and fiddles with a strand of brightly-colored beads in her hair.
“Can I talk about Princeton?” she asks, and her mother seizes up beside her.
Doctor Horadi nods. “I would love to hear about Princeton.” She glances at Clover’s mother. “Are you joining us, Mrs. Lee?”
Mrs. Lee nods stiffly.
They convene in a comfortably sized room with chairs in the corner and a low, plastic table with crayons and paper in the middle. Mrs. Lee sits in the chairs and watches warily as Clover immediately spots the drawing supplies and lights up. Doctor Horadi is delighted to see Clover’s immediate responsiveness, and walks to the low table and pats the pillows on the floor there. “Want to sit here and draw while we talk, Clover?”
Clover draws an angry blob of peach next to a brick house.
“That’s nice,” Doctor Horadi notes, and points to the blob. “Who is this?”
“Jax,” Clover replies immediately, adding a scribble of brown to the blob. Hair, she supposes.
“Who is Jax?”
“Prince’s brother,” she says.
Doctor Horadi hums knowingly. “And who is Princeton, Clover?”
Clover looks at her then, her dark eyes wide and innocent, and she tells her, “I’m Princeton.” A pause. “I think.”
“I see. Are you Prince right now? Or are you Clover?”
The brown crayon snaps in half; she reaches for a replacement. “Um, both. I’m Clover here, but I’m Prince there.”
There’s a loud sniff from the corner of the room, and Doctor Horadi spies Mrs. Lee, crying. Silently, she withdraws a fresh pack of tissues from her pockets, hands it to her, and sits back down beside the young girl, who has started drawing another figure with round hair and brown skin.
“Who is this, Clover?”
“It’s Prince,” she chirps, then her brow furrows. “I don’t know what he looks like. So because he’s me, I’m drawing me.”
“Oh, clever idea,” she supplies. There’s a beat. “How do you know you’re Princeton, Clover?”
She hums, and selects a bright pink crayon to add a dress. “Because I am,” she insists. “I see everything he sees...I hear everything he hears… And I feel everything he feels, too.”
“And what is Princeton doing right now?”
There’s a glazed, far-off look that covers her features then, almost as if her very soul leaves her body. As the seconds tick by, Doctor Horadi becomes more and more worried, then Clover speaks. “I just woke up. Jax is telling dad he won’t share his blanket with me.”
She giggles, and somewhere, Princeton laughs for the first time.
“Jax is funny,” she says, wide grin across her lips. Her large eyes find Doctor Horadi’s again, and she blinks curiously. “If Jax is Prince’s brother, and I’m Prince, does that mean Jax is my brother?”
Fifteen years in the field couldn't have prepared her for this question. She forces a smile, glances back at Clover’s mother, who blows her nose loudly, and she replies slowly, “I suppose he would be.”
Privately in the corner during a quick break, Mrs. Lee cries into the doctor’s arms. “She’s been like this for three months.” They watch as Clover’s hand stills over the paper, her expression glazing again, and moments later she bursts out laughing. “What’s wrong with her?”
She has no idea.
“At first,” Mrs. Lee sniffs, “I thought he was just an imaginary friend. She talked about him all the time. Mama, Prince has a mama, too! Mama, Jax is Prince’s older brother! Mama, Prince’s mom stays home all day with him! Why can’t you stay with me?” She deftly takes another tissue, half the pack littered on the floor by their sharp-heeled shoes. “Look at her,” she whispers as Clover giggles again. “My baby girl. Could it be one of those - those split personality things?”
No, it isn’t that.
“You don’t think it’s... schizophrenia, do you?”
It might be. “Nothing is certain yet,” Doctor Horadi assures Mrs. Lee. “It could be a lot of things, more of them good than bad. But it is a possibility.”
“She disassociates all the time,” Mrs. Lee sobs. “Gets that fucking look on her face. Then she tells me what Princeton is doing, what funny thing Jax said to him. I’m a working mother, Doctor. My husband is away a lot. I can’t be with her all the time if I want to put food on the table. Does she need... god... Does she need to be institutionalized?”
“Mrs. Lee,” the doctor says firmly, grasping the mother’s hands between her own, “that is not something I will allow to happen. Bring Clover back to me once a week. I’ll get to the bottom of whatever this is, I promise you.”
Clover hums a song, one her mother has never taught her, but one that Princeton’s sings over his cradle every night.
“I’m going to help your little girl.”
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