There are some things Alexi is going to have to come to terms with, he supposes. In the month Percy has been away at the hospital, nursing Eric back to health, Alexi’s test scores have picked up again. He’s back to normal high grades. The instructors are pleased, naturally, and of course Alexi is pleased too, but it does make it rather obvious it’s Percy who’s distracting him.

An instructor has gone out to Percy. He’s still achieving perfect grades, of course, but Demian reports that he’s struggling to hold himself together. He really can’t handle the chance of losing someone precious, it seems. He was right. Although, from what Damien says, there’s not much chance of Eric not pulling through. He’s out of the danger zone. Not that it seems to ease Percy’s anxiety.

His grades returning to normal might be reassuring but if he has to spend all his time alone studying, is it really worth it. It’s definitely not fun. Then again, is there time for fun with all the threats in the world right now. He can have fun when he’s qualified. Is there any point throwing away so much just for the idea of fun?

“You look worried,” Damien says, joining Alexi on a small wall.

“I figured something out,” Alexi says with a sigh. “Something I didn’t really want to figure out.”

Damien smiles and nods. “Percy knows.”

“Knows what?”

“That you only really needed something to distract you from Mika.” Alexi nods slightly. He hadn’t really wanted to think about that. He hadn’t wanted to acknowledge it. “Percy knew that from the start. He’s not going to be mad about it.”

“This entire relationship has been based on him believing it won’t last?” Alexi says, reaching for the tips of his hair. “Doesn’t that make it sort of hollow? Why waste time doing something you know won’t last?”

“For the sake of doing it,” Damien replies. “If you only did things that would last forever, we’d never do anything.”

Alexi frowns. He supposes, when he puts it like that, Damien does have a point. Perhaps he’s not really learnt everything he needs to from them but he doesn’t think he can carry on like this for long. Not right now.

“Percy’s not the type who’s going to forget about you either,” Damien says with a smile. “He doesn’t forget much, you know. He never really leaves someone behind. You should talk to him.”

He nods slowly. He had to talk to Percy eventually. It’s not like he can deal with this without a word to Percy but now doesn’t feel like the right time. How’s he supposed to talk about their relationship when he’s busy worrying over Eric?

As if on cue, Alexi’s phone goes off in his pocket. He smiles bitterly. Damien is wandering off with a smile and wave. Being left on his own to face this might be the proper way of dealing with it, but it’s not reassuring.

“Percy.”

“You don’t sound happy,” Percy chirps. He sounds far too happy for the situation he’s in. “I saw the results table. Your results are getting way better. Is that because I’m not there to distract you?”

Alexi sighs, “I think it might be. Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he replies. “Things are what they are. If you can’t focus because I’m distracting you, then that’s just how things are, right?”

“You results are still looking pretty good,” Alexi says.

“These things just come naturally,” he says.

“How’s Eric and his friend?”

“Isaak. I think they’re more than friends, you know? Or at least, I think- well, I know Eric is kinda mad about him.” There’s voice in the distance and Percy laughs. “Hush, I’m talking about you, not too you.”

“He’s there?” Alexi says.

“He is,” Percy says. “And he’s too noisy for someone who’s supposed to be resting.”

“I’m ok,” Eric groans in the background. “I just want to make sure Isaak’s ok and go back to school.”

“No school until you’re better,” he says firmly. “So, what’s up with you, Lexi? What’s wrong?”

“Percy, I…

“Oh.” Percy laughs awkwardly and Alexi sighs. “Oh, you’re going to apologise again, aren’t you? Don’t do that. It’s not a big deal.”

“Isn’t it?” Alexi says with a frown.

“Of course not,” Percy says. “You focus on you. Do what you need to. Your education is important to you, right? So, focus on that.”

“I feel like the worst person in the world breaking up with you right now.”

Percy laughs. “I don’t need you to stay with me out of pity. It doesn’t have to be permanent, either. Maybe once we’re a bit more grown up and education is less of the focus...”

“Maybe,” Alexi replies. He smiles and tilts his head. “I hope so.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet,” he says. “I hope so too.”

“So… I’ll see you when you get back…”

“Can’t wait. Bye, Lexi.”

“Bye.”

“Did you just get dumped?” Eric laughs in the background.

“Shut up, shortie,” Percy mutters.

“I’m already taller than you.”

The line goes dead and Alexi sighs. That wasn’t as bad as he’d feared. Alexi takes a deep breath and manages to smile. He reaches up, almost tangling his fingers into his hair but pauses. He’s stopping that, isn’t he? Stop hurting himself. Focus on his own well being.

Does he even know how to do that?