My mother flitted back and forth on calling the police well into the night. She needed to do something, but no answers came to her. She ended up falling asleep on the couch- a personally amusing little factoid I decided to hold onto for less stressful times.

She was still asleep when I had to get up for school. It wasn’t good to open the store late but weekday mornings tended to be pretty quiet. I decided to let her sleep in. I’d tell her I tried if she attempted to scold me over it. ‘But I had to go to class...’ seemed hard enough to argue against. I almost flipped the sign on the door to ‘open’ as I stepped out. I really wasn’t thinking at that moment. I’m guessing at least part of it had to do with Blast waiting on her bike right in front of the store. I’m not too proud to admit I screamed and ran back inside, slamming the door behind me. I scrambled between some of the shelves to hide. My heart skipped ast the bell on the door jingled. I hadn’t actually locked it behind me and Blast had walked right in and was now staring down at me holding my knees between the shelves.

She chuckled, reaching an arm down to me.

“C'mon, up up.”

I took her hand reluctantly and she helped me to my feet.

“Cute skirt” she teased. I wrinkled my nose but said nothing. Blast shoved a bike helmet at me.

“C'mon I’ll give you a ride.” Her eyes told me this was more of an order than an invitation. She grinned as I adjusted the straps. This whole situation felt like a half-remembered dream. Standing in my mother’s store, wearing a bike helmet across from an smug yakuza that was actually this girl from my childhood I barely ever knew. I was tempted to just go along with it. If I’ve gone mad, why fight it? So yeah, I rode with Blast to school. The whole thing felt so… unnatural. Blast kicked out the stand and took my helmet when we arrived. Even stepping up to the sidewalk had this warped feeling to it. The adrenaline or stress or something had to be getting to me. I tried to shake the cobwebs out as Blast stepped up to me.

“Hey, I wanted to ask something.” Blast shoved her hands in the pockets of her riding jacket. I simply nodded and she continued.

“I know shit’s hard on your mom. I also know a way to make things easier.” Blast stepped closer to me. “You become a dragon, you and your mom are our family. She’ll be protected at no cost.”

“No cost?” I had to repeat it. Blast leaned back a bit, showing off a bit of fang.

“Absolutely. Not only that, you’ll get your cut of the earnings.” I tried shaking my head again and gave myself a moment to think.

“You want me to be yakuza?” I had been right! This was just a stupid dream. Only it wasn’t as fake as it all felt, every sense I had, told me I was still there.

“Computer - End Program” I whispered to myself.

“What?” Blast looked amused. I considered the question. I’m no yakuza no matter how you try and spin it.

‘Hi Mom, Imma gangster!’ I choked on the absurdity. I mean I wouldn’t even know where to start being a criminal. Not to mention the National Defense Academy probably would not look kindly on someone with a criminal past. I mean I hated the bookstore but it was… what I knew. I’d been in trouble before lots of times but I wasn’t a delinquent.

I was roused from my thought by Blast being way closer and far taller than I remembered. I tried to step back but someone had left the school fence in the way. Blast practically had me pinned to it. The scene had drawn the attention of a small cluster of freshman who seemed none too eager to come to my defense. All I could do was flatten my back against the fence. Which prompted Blast to lean in closer.

“You should think about it.” Blast whispered into my ear. I nodded nervously and she finally backed off looking punch-ably cocky. If she wasn’t both willing and capable of flattening me into the dirt I might well have taken a swing. Well… I might have thought about it.

Blast took my helmet and rode off with a cheeky grin. She was always smiling around me and it was beginning to piss me off. She was mocking me with her big dumb face, I just knew it.

I tried to put her out of my mind and focused on class. It didn’t help the whole day everything still felt wrong. Even the same old class routine felt completely different. It was oddly refreshing if I’m honest. That is until I got pulled aside by my homeroom teacher during lunch break. She made a point of taking me to be alone so I was obviously in trouble.

She stared me down suspiciously.

“Can you tell me about this morning?” I tried not to sigh audibly. All told this had been shaping up to be a good day. I folded my arms.

“An old family friend gave me a ride in.” I could see she didn’t approve of the answer. It wasn’t a lie or anything. “Our mothers are close friends.”

She shifted uncomfortably.

“Some of the other students told us she seemed… troublesome?” There it is, I knew that group of freshman would narc on me. I wasn’t doing anything wrong! She let me off with a warning but the whole thing soured my afternoon. At least mom didn’t expect me at the store today since Sakiko, our one part timer, always came in on Mondays. So I had the afternoon to myself soon as I hit the shoe lockers. Not that I had any plans other than going home and playing Ace Combat 7.

I was just out of the school gate when a dark shadow fell over me. I froze for only a moment before breaking into a reckless and panicked sprint, nearly tipping over trying to escape. I found myself quickly out of breath and my legs failed. The shadow enveloped me and I screamed wildly. Passers by quickly scattered as I wailed but the arms wrapped around me did little but restrain.

“Enough!” a familiar voice stuttered as Tracksuit finally spun me around. She crossed her arms and glared at me.

“Where are you running off to?” I couldn’t look her in the eyes.

“Away? I’m just trying to get home.” She relaxed a bit.

“Sorry about that. Boss asked us to keep an eye on you. Eh... What was your name again?”

I blinked.

“Kairi?” It came out sounding like a question.

“Yeah hey, I’m Tsubasa.” She said, stretching her arms back behind her head. Today she was wearing a hoodie and sweatpants, both looked well worn. Tsubasa scratched the back of her head a bit, yawning.

“We gonna go to your place or are you just gonna stare at me?” I pulled myself together, spun on my heel and began to march home. She stayed at my heels the entire way.

Tsubasa followed me inside the bookstore and nearly gave my mother a heart attack escorting me upstairs.

“Western style, nice!” Tsubasa bounced on her heels and tossed herself down on my couch. She stretched out on it like a feral tiger and gave me a toothy grin. “Sorry about this.” She yawned. “The tigers really stirred up the hive. Boss wants someone on you for a few days in case they come back.” I flicked on the TV and picked up my controller.

“So that’s why Blast was hanging around this morning? I figured she was just messing with me.” If her goal had been getting in my head, it was infuriating how well that had worked. Being that easily provoked only made me more upset and I had to cut off that line of thought before I completely lost it. I picked out a single player mission to grind on.

“She told me she wanted me to join up. That you’d leave my mom’s store alone if I did.” I picked the SU-47 my raven haired goddess. I was an absolute sucker for forward swept wings so It’d been my goal to unlock it quickly. Tsubasa lightly scratched her tummy

“Well yeah. We take care of our own. We protected Ms. Kim’s right? I don’t blame you for turning it down though. No offense but you’re a tiny, out of shape coward. I mean… some girls are just better suited to being a housewife.”

I briefly considered how I was supposed to not be offended by that before settling on the truth behind the words. I was not in the best shape spending my afternoons sitting behind a shop counter or in front of the tv, like I was doing right now.

“Fighter Pilot” my grip on the controller tightened and I poured just enough venom into it to make my point clear.

“What?” Tsubasa asked halfheartedly.

“I’m going to be a fighter pilot” I tried to put the edge back in my voice but it came out more as a squeak. Tsubasa laughed.

“Alright, alright. Fighter Pilot.” My blood was boiling as I paused the game.

“I wouldn’t be the first.” I challenged.

“What about in Japan?” she retorted dismissively. I’d been waiting for this.’

“Matsushima Misa.” I grinned.

“I still wouldn’t be the first. She flies an F-15J with the 305th. It’s an upgraded revision of the F-15 Eagle.”

I heard her mutter to herself something along the lines of “Never argue with an otaku.” I shot her a dirty look but by the cocky smile she gave me it had only served to encourage her.

“You’re a dork but I think I like ya.” She ruffled my hair and laid back a bit.

I took a deep breath and focused in on my objective. I popped a drone with a missile. It was discouraging how much difficulty I was having. Perhaps it was me bucking against the limits of trying to fly on a dualshock rather than the flight stick I’d really wanted. Or maybe I was just garbage… I was deep into the campaign but I hadn’t dared dive into multiplayer. In truth I probably never would, This game was an escape for me. A chance to feel like an ace pilot and going up against a wall of toxic overly competitive jerks did not sound fun.

Part of me was worried. Tsubasa was probably right. I didn’t have the stuff to be an ace pilot. I couldn’t even start up the stupid multiplayer on this stupid stupid non-realistic game. Even when there were no stakes, nothing on the line I chose to play it safe in the campaign.

Another drone popped… and I felt no closer to achieving my dreams.