France, Oregon

12:14 PM, Tuesday, January 24th, 2023

Patty and Tess rang the bell at France Retirement Village.

“We’re here to see Fred Stavridis,” Patty told the receptionist.

The women had actually met Fred a few times before, but now, with the new information they learned the previous day, they just had to talk to him. So they called him up from the number they found in Murray’s address book.

Just minutes later, they were sitting in the fireplace lounge of the village clubhouse. Fred’s eyes watered a little bit as he held Murray’s diary. Some memories were coming back to surface.

“Do you need some time?” asked Patty. “I can ask my questions later, if you’d like.”

“No, no,” said Fred.

He put the diary down on the table and wiped his glasses before continuing.

“I’m still in shock about his death. I’m the older one, after all, I thought I would die first.”

“Let’s not go there, please,” said Patty.

“I guess I should start with the obvious. Murray was still closeted. even ten years after his wife died. Don’t get me wrong, Helen was a lovely woman, and I know your grandpa loved her. But I was one of the few people who knew he’s bi.”

“Why didn’t he tell us? I mean, for God’s sake, he was the first relative I outed myself to.”

Fred chuckled. “I know. He told me. He was very proud of you. But he still chose to stay closeted, because that’s just what he wanted. So I didn’t push him on the matter; it was his business.”

“That’s a good point,” said Tess.

Patty sighed. “Fine. I still want to know more, though.”

“How much much have you read so far?” Fred asked her.

“Just before you started your senior year.”

“Ah, yes. Senior year. Murray didn’t want me to leave him, but I still had things to figure out.”

7:32 PM, Tuesday, September 2nd, 1952

Fred and Murray were once again subject to a parent-run birthday party, despite their protests.

The Newmans had put together a small house party for the two, setting up a barbecue dinner in the backyard. The baseball team and some other students from France High came over and had a dinner of burgers and salad, followed by strawberry cake.

The party had been very dull at first. However, the Newmans were invited by one of the other kids’ parents for drinks across the street. After the adults were gone, things loosened up a bit at the party.

Fred’s friend Justin Allison pulled him into the empty mudroom while everyone else was scattered about the backyard and the lower floor.

“All right,” said Justin, “You’ve been staring at him all night.”

“I have not!” said Fred, defensively.

When it wasn’t Baseball season, Fred chose to do theater instead of other sports. That’s where he met Justin, his second-best friend.

Justin was… unique amongst the student body. He was never into traditionally male activities, and he was very preppy when it came to fashion. When he met Fred, Justin could tell right away that they shared a similar secret: they were both gay.

“Please, brother, you were almost drooling when he wiped that frosting off of your chin.”

Fred sighed as he looked out the window towards Murray, who was laughing with his teammates from the baseball team.

“I wish I could tell him,” Fred admitted. “But I’m just afraid he’ll react… horribly.”

“So you need to move on! Seriously Fred, you’re eighteen now. Come with me to the Homophile club.”

Fred didn’t respond. He kept looking out the window at Murray.

“Fred,” said Justin. “Give it up. You’re just hurting yourself more.”

Fred turned back towards Justin.

“I guess,” he sighed. “Let’s head back out.”

Meanwhile, Murray had his eyes on someone.

“Hannah!” he exclaimed, as Hannah Graber walked over to Murray’s group.

“I’ll give you two some privacy,” said Kevin.

“I won’t,” said James, cheekily.

Kevin pulled James up by the collar and dragged him away.

“All right, all right, I’m going!” James shouted.

Murray paid neither of them any attention. Instead, his eyes were focused on Hannah, who he had taken to the sophomore prom just months before, but hadn’t had any interaction with since.

“Hi Murr,” said Hannah.

“Hannah,” he replied. “I haven’t seen you in months. Did I do something?”

“No! Of course not. You were very much a gentleman at the dance.”

“What happened, then?”

Hannah looked down at her feet.

“After I got home that night, my dad told me he had accepted a job… in Omaha.”

Murray’s eyes widened when Hannah revealed that information. He had had a crush on Hannah for… maybe seven years now.

“I don’t understand,” said Murray. “We just started our Junior year.”

“You didn’t notice I wasn’t at school today today? Or last Thursday and Friday?”

“Oh. I was wondering about that.”

“I can’t believe he just dropped this on us, and then dragged it out for months until the school year started.”

“When do you leave?”

“Friday afternoon.”

Murray nodded solemnly.

“I hope I didn’t hurt you,” Hannah continued. “I just couldn’t bear the thought of telling you. I was so nervous. I really like you.”

“I like you too. But, I got to say, Hann, I wish you had told me sooner.”

Hannah hugged Murray.

“I know. I bet you think I’m a real jerk.”

Murray hugged back.

“No, I would never think that about you.”

“I was hoping to have some alone time with you before I go.”

“Me too.”

Murray looked around.

“Hannah,” he said.

Hannah looked up to him.

“No one’s paying attention,” he continued. “We could get a little alone time now.”

“Are suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?”

Murray pulled her closer.

“Only if you’re okay with it,” Murray said.

Hannah pulled Murray into a deep kiss.

“I am,” she said as she pulled away.

Justin and Fred sat in the sunroom, chatting with Kevin and James.

“The big one-eight, Freddy,” said Kevin. “Anything you want to do?”

“Well, I’m kind of interested in going surfing someday, but right now, it might be too cold for that.”

“Surfing?!” said James. “Oh come on, you’re an adult now! What about beer?”

“It’s always beer with you,” said Justin. “Personally, when I turn eighteen, I want to travel. Maybe to Paris. Or Florence.”

“That sounds nice,” said Kevin. “Personally, I’d like to check out Honolulu.”

“Or Munich,” said James.

“Oh please!” said Justin. “You just want to go to Munich for Oktoberfest beer!”

“Yeah, what’s your point?”

The boys laughed.

“My family has an island in Greece,” said Fred. “Now that I’m eighteen, I’d love to buy a ticket to Greece so I can stay there buy myself someday.”

“Not entirely by yourself, I hope,” said Kevin. “If you’re going to Greece, we’re coming with you.”

“Okay, fine. Maybe it’d be nice to have you guys and Murray along for the trip.”

“What about girls?!” said James. “Aren’t we bringing girls?!”

“Idiot,” said Kevin. “You don’t go on vacation with guys to bring girls, you go on vacation with guys to pick up girls.”

“Oh yeah!” said James, laughing. “How about that? A trip to Greece for wine and girls!”

Justin and Fred laughed nervously.

“Right,” said Fred. “Maybe I should go check on Murr. I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“You’re so protective of him, Freddy,” teased Kevin.

Justin followed Fred as he headed into the living room.

“Hey, have you guys seen Murray?” Fred said to some girls on the couch.

“I think he went upstairs with Hannah,” one of them said.

Fred thanked them, and walked up the stairs. He checked the upstairs loft for signs of Hannah or Murray.

“Murr?” Fred shouted.

“What are you doing?” said Justin, who came up the stairs behind Fred.

“I’m looking for Murr. I just want to make sure he’s okay.”

“You have got to stop acting like he’s… the miracle child. He’s not yours to protect.”

Fred started through the hallway.

“He’s my best friend, Justin.”

“That’s how he sees you. You want more than that. You’ve got to face the facts, Fred. You’re only going to be friends with him. He’s as straight as they come.”

Fred suddenly stopped in his tracks in front of the door to Murray’s room.

“What?” said Justin.

Fred shushed him. There were sounds coming from Murray’s bedroom. The sounds of two people. Murray… and Hannah.

“Oh my God,” said Fred, crushed.

He went back into the loft and slumped down on the couch.

“Maybe it’s not what you think,” said Justin.

“Justin, I don’t live under a rock. I know what those sounds are.”

Justin sat next to Fred and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Oh, Fred,” he whispered. “I know I said I wanted you to get over Murray, but this has to be crushing. I’m so sorry.”

Fred teared up. “I want to go home,” he told Justin. “Right now. I don’t even want to say goodbye to anyone just take me home.”

“All right.”

Justin pulled Fred up, and they headed out of Murray’s house.