Continuing onto firsts for me, I had help getting dressed today. A maid, who introduced herself as Daphne entered my room the moment I opened my eyes, saying she was to be my personal maid. That I was uncomfortable might be an understatement. The only other person to ever see me naked, aside from my aunt, is Gemma and that’s only because we’ve known each other for almost seven years now.

Thankfully it doesn’t take long, and I am being ushered to Gemma’s room. Together we go to the dining hall for breakfast.

“Hey Daphne?”

“Yes, my lady?”

I try my hardest not to make a face at the title but I know I failed when Gemma snickers. “Where is my grandmother?”

“Ah. Queen Rosedriah will meet with you all at dinner, during the meeting.”

“Oh...thank you.” Butterflies erupt in my stomach at the thought. Unprepared is an understatement for how I feel about tonight. I look at my food, my stomach churning at the sight. 

“Done eating? I was thinking about checking out the garden.” Gemma says, coming to my rescue. I nod, standing and looping arms with her.

Daphne leads us outside, and waits by the door while Gemma pulls me away. We walk a bit aimlessly, arms still linked together. Gemma is talking about how much she loves her room and how having a personal maid is so strange when something catches my eye.

I slow to a stop. A man is a distance away, bent at the waist. He has one hand in his pant pocket, the other stretched out delicately touching the petal of a flower. His white hair cascades around his shoulders, blocking his face from my view.

“What is he doing?” Gemma asks from beside me. 

It’s then I notice the flower looks to be dead. He blows on it, and it slowly blooms back to life.

Gemma gasps unnecessarily loud, and his eyes snap to mine. I suck in a breath, freezing for just a moment before swiftly tugging Gemma away.

By the time dinner rolls around I can’t decide if I’m hungry or if I want to throw up. Eating is out of the question, and I wonder if anyone would call me out if I feigned sick. It wouldn’t give him the best impression of me but at this point I would take that over having to speak to him.

There is a knock on my door, and then Daphne and Gemma are walking into my room. I allow Daphne to help me into the dusty rose dress from yesterday, resigning myself to following the pair out of the room and to the dining hall.

Grandmother Rose is already at the table when we arrive, standing and motioning for us to sit down. She smiles when she sees me in my dress, patting me on the shoulder gently when I make my way to her.

“Our guest should be along shortly.” She says once we get settled.

As if on cue the doors open and my hands are in front of me, nerves set off for what feels like the millionth time since arriving in Sedalia.

To my surprise, the man from the garden strolls into the room. Seeing him up close, I can tell he is tall, his hair pulled into a bun. What I couldn’t tell in the garden was the color of his eyes. They are a strange mix of gray and gold; strange because the gold seems to be concentrated around his pupil. It is a contrast I find it difficult to look away from.

I am only able to drag my eyes from his when I’m jabbed in the side by Gemma who hisses a “woah he’s hot.”

“This is Caspian Lux.” Grandma Rose says, gesturing toward him.

I stand quickly, trying not to wince when my chair scrapes against the tile. Caspian bows, which I respond with a curtsy. “Pleasure to meet you, princess.”

“You can call me Pandora!” I say, trying to ignore the fact that his voice is currently causing my stomach to knot.

“Sit, sit. The food isn’t going to eat itself.” Rosedriah says, to which I swiftly comply, though it does nothing to quell the feeling of Caspian’s eyes on me. Like he’s studying me. I try my hardest not to squirm in my seat.

“Panda.” Gemma whispers not too quietly. I turn to her, edging away from her poking at my side. “Dude, your husband is hot. How did you get so lucky?”

It’s times like these I find myself grateful I am too dark for the blush to show on my cheeks, since I can feel my face heating up. Gemma has never been good at being subtle, or quiet, as she is so obnoxiously demonstrating now. I try my hardest to focus on my food when she says, “Oh, Love Dove, Daphne said later on she’d show me to the library. Apparently it’s really freakin’ huge!”

“Love Dove?” I look to see Caspian raising an eyebrow, amusement clear on his face. 

I silently curse Gemma when she proceeds to explain the nickname. “Well when I met Pandora, she was going by Dove on account of thinking that was her name and all. Love Dove is something I’ve been calling her for years. Of course, if you think it’s too much you can always call her Panda.”

“Or he could call me by my name, Gemma.” I finally interject, shooting a glare towards my best friend. Though now I’m thinking I should revoke that title. “You don’t have to call me anything but Pandora.”

To my dismay Caspian smiles. “I think I like Dove.”

Gemma snickers while I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.

Later that night I find it hard to sleep, a habit I seem to have picked up lately. I roll out of bed, sleeping on a robe and venturing outside. It takes me a bit to find my way but soon I am outside in the gardens. I take a deep breath, letting the cool air calm my nerves. Though the air isn’t too crisp, I know I won’t be able to stay outside long before the cold catches up to me.

I don’t know my way around the garden well enough to go too far away from the door, but a faint glow a little ways ahead of me catches my attention and I find myself following it. A giant tree is where I am led, the glow coming from Caspian. His hand is on the trunk and he has a slight frown on his face. He doesn’t look as if he wishes to be disturbed, not that I would go over to greet him anyway.

Just as I make up my mind to go back to my room, movement out of the corner of my eye causes me to pause. Everything in me is screaming for me to go back but I can’t help but watch. A woman approaches Caspian, though she is too far away for me to make out what she looks like. 

The screams to leave get louder but it is as if I am rooted to the spot. The woman says something to Caspian, but he doesn’t reply, only straightening slowly and turning to look at her. It feels as if I am disturbing something when she steps even closer to Caspian, hands on his chest.

My chest tightens. Who is this woman? His girlfriend? It’d make sense, this is an arranged marriage after all. Maybe he’s being forced to marry me. It explains why he seemed less than thrilled to meet me.

Still, I can’t help the frown when the woman goes to hug Caspian.

Surprisingly, though, when the woman pulls away from Caspian, tears in her eyes, Caspian looks completely unfazed. In fact, he hadn’t hugged her back either. Almost as if he doesn’t want to be bothered. He says something I can’t hear, pushing the woman away from him.

She looks hurt. More words are exchanged and Caspian begins walking away. I suck in a breath when the woman suddenly turns and makes eye contact with me. Definitely time for me to head back inside.

“So you saw Caspian and some woman hugging last night?”

I nod, picking at the edge of my cover. Gemma hums, turning toward me with her hands on her hips. “You think he’s cheatin’ on you?”

“Cheating? We barely know each other. For all we know he could have had a girlfriend or something before he was forced to get married to me.” I sit up. “What if they decide to stay together after we get married? He’ll have a mistress. Is that allowed? Am I supposed to be okay with that?”

“It looks suspicious.” Gemma sighs, patting me on the head. “I wouldn’t stress about it though. You said he didn’t look happy to see her so don’t worry.”

A knock on the door interrupts our conversation, and Daphne is inside the room, telling me that Rosedriah requests my presence. 

“I’ll be in the library. Have fun with your grandma.” Gemma says, winking at me. She leaves the room and I follow Daphne to where Rosedriah is waiting.

I can hear yelling behind the double doors and I hesitate to go in, heart slamming in my chest.

“How do we even know that’s Claudio’s kid?”

“You think I don’t know my own granddaughter?”

“Regardless, she has no idea of our lifestyles, customs or anything. How will she be able to run the kingdom?” 

“I say we let Lord Phillip remain in charge for the time being. Two months is hardly enough time to learn to run a kingdom.”

“A VonMerlyn belongs on the throne, you know this. My granddaughter will take her rightful place, end of discussion.”

Daphne gives me a look as if to say “good luck” before knocking on the door. At my grandmother’s “enter” she pushes open the doors and I slowly walk in. Any chatter that had been going quieted at my entrance, and my hands are already in front of me, twisting and turning. 

“Well would you look at that! She’s the spittin’ image of ya Rosedriah.” A man laughs. I don’t remember hearing his voice among the protestors. “There’s definitely no denying she’s a VonMerlyn.”

Grandmother comes to stand next to me, her hand on the middle of my back. “Allow me to introduce Pandora Dove VonMerlyn, only child of Claudia Ezra VonMerlyn, Heir to the Throne.”

Though I’m trying not to let it show, being introduced in such a way is extremely uncomfortable for me, and I want nothing more than to run and hide. I am their future queen, and I don’t need to give them any more reason to disapprove.

To my surprise, sitting right in my line of vision is Caspian. He is tucked into the corner of the room, not sitting at the table like the rest of the men present. I don’t notice right away what he’s looking at, but when I realize he’s staring at my hands I move them behind me. His eyes shoot up to mine, and my breath catches in my throat. I can’t tell if it’s pity in his eyes, or something else, but I force myself to look away from his gaze.

Rosedriah is introducing the men sitting at the table and admittedly most of the names escape my mind the moment she mentions them. 

The ones that do stick out in my mind are Philip Visconti and his son, Adrien. According to Grandmother, Philip is the one who has been running the kingdom in my absence. And if the way neither of the men are hiding their disdain from their faces, they aren’t too happy with the fact that I’m here now.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is a man named Nathaniel Rosetti, who is my advisor. He has a much kinder look about him, and though I am still weary of everyone in the room, it may not hurt to trust him at least a little.

I breathe out a small sigh of relief when Rosedriah tells me I may leave. I give a quick curtsy, trying not to run out of the room. It’s incredibly difficult, especially since I feel severely inadequate with all the disapproving stares.

Once out of the room, I pause to take another deep breath. It isn’t helping, though, and I know I need to be outside.

It takes a moment for me to realize I’m being followed. I pause in my steps, whirling around to see the cause of the sound of footsteps behind me. To my surprise, Caspian is standing just a few feet away from me, hands in his pockets. 

“Did you follow me out?”

He raises an eyebrow, still looking nonchalant as he says, “I was concerned you might collapse given how terrified you seemed back there.” His eyes fall to my hands, which have betrayed my nerves once more by wringing in front of me.

I move them behind my back, turning away from him and continuing on my quest to find the way outside. Caspian almost immediately falls into step behind me and I let out a small sigh.

We walk in relative for a short while, Caspian following me dutifully as I wind my way around the castle. 

“Are you lost, Princess?”

His words are gentle, and I slow my pace, allowing him to catch up to me. “I was looking for the way to the garden.” I confess, refusing to meet his gaze.

“Follow me.” Caspian easily takes the lead, going in the direction we’d just come from. His strides are long and I have to quicken my pace to keep up with him.

We make it outside quickly. Once the cool air hits my lungs I let out a breath of relief. 

“Do you feel better?” There is a hint of amusement in Caspian’s voice that I choose to ignore, nodding at his question.

“Being outside or in the water always makes me feel better.”

Caspian lets out a hum, catching a falling leaf. “Nature certainly has its way of calming one's nerves.” He turns to me with a gentle smile. “Come, let’s walk some.”