Anger is a savage beast that can't be tamed. It can't be steered or reasoned with. Yet, here I am, trying to reason with the ever-present rage.

"Malaya, are you okay?" Noon asks.

She is my best friend, yet she doesn't get it.

Fighting with monsters is easy. Killing is easy. Confronting my inner demons is impossible.

"I'm fine," I say, trying to extinguish the fire from my eyes.

A demon slayer shouldn't be the same as the demons she is fighting. Yet I repeatedly find myself precariously dangling from the edge of the abyss of no return. I'm in danger of being swallowed by the same emptiness that all demons come from.

One action is all that separates me from becoming like them, from being the soulless monster.

"We need to go! More demons are coming," Noon says.

"So what? Let them come!" I say as my blood burns with the need to release the fury flowing through my veins.

What better way to resolve one's emotional issues than a vicious battle.

"There are too many of them. Even you can't win," Noon says.

She does have a point. I can't allow fury to blind me. It's not what Sun would have wanted.

Revenging his death at the cost of other demon slayers is unacceptable.

"Fine. Retreat," I say, throwing the transportation potion.

Just like that, we're back at the castle, where we can regroup in peace.

"Malaya," a stern voice calls my name.

The moment I register who it is, I know I am in trouble. After all, the demon slayer's job is to protect the innocent, not punish demons for what one of them did to my friend.

"Yes, sensei," I reply, leaving the others to care for the wounded.

"You have broken your promise," he says, disappointed.

"I apologize," I say, lowering my gaze.

"Anger is like a wildfire. It rages and burns through your heart until all that's left is a blackened shell of the vibrant, loving organ that used to beat in your chest," he says.

"What am I supposed to do? Let the monster roam the Earth freely while my friend will never get to see another sunset or enjoy the feel of the wind on his skin?" I ask angrily as a few sparks escape my fingertips.

"You are focusing on all the wrong things. You need to defeat your inner demons before being victorious against your enemy," he says.

"How?" I ask.

"Accept his death. Acknowledge the fact that you cannot alter someone's destiny. Upon doing that, you can grieve as long as you need. Only then will you rise like a phoenix from the ashes, reborn," he says.

"No!" I exclaim, tears of anger filling my eyes. "If I accept his death, I will be accepting that I'll never see him again, never hear his voice. How am I supposed to do that?"

"If you want to honor his memory, you will find a way.

"Everyone is different. I cannot point out the right path for you to follow. What I can tell you is to follow your heart, to listen closely to what it has to say, and you'll get there," he says.

With that, he leaves me to fight my own battles. After all, no one can fight them for me, not even my sensei.

There are things in one's life that we have to face alone if we ever want to truly see an improvement in our lives. For me, that's facing my friend's death and not allowing it to consume me, to erase who I am.

The lightness of good cannot allow itself to be dimmed by the power of evil. If I allow that to happen, innocent people will suffer because of my selfish actions.

I decide to take a long walk and attempt to find the emotional balance that I used to possess... before everything that I ever knew was turned upside down.

A sudden noise makes me turn sharply. That's when I see it.

The moment I lay my eyes on its enormous horns and ugly face, I know that I am not looking at just any demon but the one who shattered my world.

Whether it is fate or Gods testing me, I am not sure, but all I want to do is rip the beast to shreds and avenge my friend. It's as if there is a new force driving me forward, a force that stings as it courses through my body.

It takes me a moment to realize what it is and when I do, I stop short of confronting my nemesis. What I am feeling is burning hate. It's something that can corrupt a demon slayer's soul and turn us into what we are fighting against.

"You killed my friend," I spit out to the demon.

"Really? You humans all look the same to me," he says without batting an eye.

"You will pay for it!" I exclaim.

"Really? If I remember your warrior code correctly, your job is to protect the innocent and defend yourselves when attacked. Punishing the guilty is not in your job description. In fact, it's strictly forbidden, something about losing your soul and all that," it says.

I grit my teeth as I realize it is making a good point. If I were to attack it, my soul would be lost forever. It is not what my friend would have wanted me to do.

Therefore, I choose to run away from the temptation, marching briskly towards the castle.

"Too much of a coward to face me?" the demon taunts me.

What he doesn't understand is I won't take the bait. I've already fought a far greater demon, my own, and won. It's the first step to my recovery, but I am not about to waste it on someone who has nothing about courage.