I woke up in Wesley’s bed alone, confusion settling into me as I lay there, thinking over the last week of my life.

Started dating Wes.

His father died.

I lost my house.

What the fuck do I do?

Tears started to well in my eyes, my throat clenching and I grabbed Wesley’s pillow, pulling it close to me. The smell of his cologne flooded me and helped me to relax as I lay there doing my best not to panic.

I could hear the door to the bedroom open and close and someone climbed into bed with me, wrapping their arm around my waist.

“Are you awake?” Wesley whispered softly.

“Mhm.”

“I made the kids breakfast. They’re coloring in the den.”

“Thank you,” I nodded, trying to keep myself together.

“You’re allowed to cry. Life is hard right now. You keep telling me to feel my emotions. I think you need to as well. Stop holding it in.”

“I just… what the hell do I do now? I have no home. No possessions. Everythings gone. All the clothes I have left are in my bag. I have no idea what Jerry managed to find. Luckily, I scan and copy everything. I’ll be able to access all of my files when I get a new computer. I’ll still have all my documents but I only have 10 thousand saved. I can’t get a new home with that. I… can’t go to work without clothes. I can’t…” my chest started to heave and Wesley carefully rolled me onto my back, crossing my arms across my chest.

“Close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth. You’re having a panic attack. We’re going to figure this out together. So breathe for me, babe. Just focus on breathing.”

I did as he asked, finding it hard and he ran his fingers through my hair a few times, my heart rate finally decreased and I let out a shaky breath, tears still in my eyes.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“Of course. It’s my job as your partner. We’re going to figure this out. It’ll be okay. I swear. Nothing will happen to you and Arlo I promise.”

“I’m just… scared. This week has been so much. Too many highs and lows. I want everything to calm down. I can’t handle this much longer.”

“And it will baby. It’ll calm down. I haven’t told Arlo yet. I don’t know how and I didn’t want to until we had a plan.”

“Thank you.”

“First. Are you hungry?”

“No.”

“Elijah… you need to eat something. Even 2 bites. Please?”

“Fine. Do you have fruit?”

“Yes. A ton.”

“Fruit and coffee then. I… can I eat out on the deck I don’t… I don’t feel ready to tell Arlo.”

“Of course. But bundle up okay? It’s cold,” he kissed me softly and rubbed my cheek, “this isn’t how I expected our relationship to start so I’m sorry it’s off to such a rough beginning but I’ll make it up to you.”

“It’s no one's fault. It’s just ironic that as soon as we both feel happy and stable, life keeps throwing stuff at us. That’s all. How are you feeling today?”

“A little better. I woke up, forgetting everything that happened, and was going to call my dad to tell him I would be home tonight… then I remembered. It’s those little things I’ll have to get used to. But I’m coming to terms with the loss. I’ll be okay. I am okay.”

“I’m glad. I was worried.”

“No need to worry. I’ll go get your breakfast,” he smiled and kissed me once more before leaving the room.

Grabbing my sweater, glasses, blanket, and phone, I headed out onto the deck and wrapped up in the blanket, staring out at the trees. With a sigh, I pulled my phone out and texted Jeremiah.

-E: Dumbass. What did you find?

-J: Uh… there was nothing left. Minus a safe?

-E: Oh. Oh, thank god. That has a ton of documents and Arlo’s first portraits from the hospital.

-J: Why the fuck do you have a fireproof safe?

-E: I’m prepared and paranoid. Holly always calls it being preparanoid.

-J: That fits you to a T. How are you doing?

-E: Well, I had an emotional breakdown a little bit ago out of fear. But Wes said we’ll figure it out together so that did help quite a bit.

-J: If there’s anyone you can trust to help, it’s him. Are you coming back tonight?

-E: I have no idea. We need to figure out what we're going to do.

-J: Okay. I have the safe at my house. Remember, you have until next month off. Mama already found a new teacher. So focus on Arlo and Wes. You’ll be okay. I know it.

-E: Thanks, Jerry. Love you.

-J: Love you too, pumpkin.

Wesley joined me on the deck carrying a bowl of mixed fruit and a coffee mug and set them on the small table in front of me before sitting down and pulling some of my blanket onto himself.

“Hi honey,” he kissed the side of my head.

“Hi. I was talking to Jerry. The uh… only thing he managed to save was my safe. It has all of my important documents and Arlo’s newborn photos so… that’s really good. I’ll take that.”

“That’s good. I’m glad there was something.”

“Wes,” I sighed, popping a strawberry into my mouth and leaning against him, “what the fuck do I do now?”

“What’s your dream?”

“What do you mean?”

“What do you want from life? If you could pick anything what would it be?”

“Um… I always wanted to homeschool Arlo at least until he started middle school. Live in a beautiful house, take care of things. I wanted a partner who was willing to let me do that. To support my dream of being home with my son. I know… I know he needs friends. When he was a baby I started looking into it. He can join clubs, the schools always offer activities he can join. He wants to dance. So he can make friends that way. Just… wanted to be a house husband,” I laughed bitterly, “Ashley told me we could do that. I was going to college anyway to ensure that I was the best teacher I could be for Arlo, and then she left and I had to make use of that degree. That was my dream. A dream that I couldn’t have after she left. There was just something about getting to be his teacher, getting to take him on special field trips that really resonated with me. But I had to work. I couldn’t afford to be home with him.”

“What if I can make that come true?” he whispered.

“How?”

“I built a classroom off of the den. In that room with the bright yellow door. Remember? I homeschooled Aurora for 2 years. We did that here. That’s why I was so tired. I was driving an extra 2 hours every day after work. We can get you whatever you need. There’s a program you sign up for with the district. All you have to turn in are his yearly standardized tests to prove that he’s at the right level. Oh and monthly work reports showing the curriculum you taught him. There’s a program I used that sends you what you need for the year and you can adjust it as he goes if he’s ahead of where he needs to be like Rory. You’ll know. It’s really no different than running a classroom, but it’s not on a set schedule. You can take breaks as long as he turns in what he’s supposed to.”

“That’s great but financially I can’t do that…”

“Mhm. Yes, you can. Stay with me, Eli. I know… I know it’s a little crazy. But if you want… switch Arlo to homeschooling. I can do that for Rory again if you wouldn’t mind being her teacher. She wants to learn from you, not anyone else. It’ll help you bond too. I can transfer to the hospital here. Multicare has been trying to hire me for 2 years now. I just couldn’t at the time. But I can now. I’ll get to work days and be home at night. I’ll make twice as much money. My house is nearly paid off. You can sell the land your house is on, save that for Arlo, or whatever you need. I’ll even pay you to teach Rory if you want, or you can get a job as an online tutor if you really feel you need to. Whatever you want. I support it.”

“But what do you want?” I sniffled, staring into his eyes.

“You. Just you. I want you and Arlo close. Honey,” he sighed softly, “I think if we tried to do the long-distance thing we were talking about… it wouldn’t have worked. If you don’t want to share a room with me just yet, I do have another in the house. You can take over that one. If it’s better to just be roommates for a little while until you adjust, I’m okay with that. I want you to be comfortable. But I have the space, I have a way to make your dreams come true. It would be helping me too. I need help with Aurora. I… I can’t take care of her alone anymore. She’s getting to an age where having someone else to depend on is important to her. The only thing I would need with you being here would be to take her twice a week to see Jerry for her therapy appointments. That’s it. I expect nothing of you. I just want you close and want to help. If at any point you want to leave, you’ll have 25 thousand to do that.”

“I only have… oh!”

“Did you just remember?” he smiled, “dad left you 15 thousand. It’s already cleared and in your account. I was on the phone all morning handling things. I sold my car to Jerry. I’m going to take my dad's. It’s electric so that’ll be nice. I signed the deed of the house to Sara, she’s going to stay there. I guess she knows your mama. They’re friends. So she wants to be close. We’re not going to have a huge funeral for my dad. There’s really no one to come except us 4, your mom, my stepmom, and the kids. We decided to have a nice dinner in his memory at your mama’s house, then you, me, and the kids will take that trip to Santa Cruz to spread his ashes. I found out… he left me a ton of money. More than I knew he had. So… financially we’ll be okay. Tell me what you want to do, and I’ll support it.”

What do I want to do?

Leave my job and homeschool the kids?

Stay with Wesley?

I don’t really know you yet.

But…

I know someone who does.

“I need to call Jerry first. Can you be quiet while I do? I want you to hear too.”

“Of course.”

Taking my phone back out, I called Jeremiah on speaker, taking a shaky breath.

“Hola hermanito. ¿Qué puedo hacer por ti?”

“Hola Jerry. On a scale of 1 to 10, how trustworthy is Wes?”

“A 15.”

“Will he ever hurt me if I decided to be in a relationship with him?”

“No. He’s been looking for someone like you for 4 years now. Since I met him. That’s why I was trying to get you two together. I knew you’d be good for each other. Perfect for each other actually.”

“If I moved to Puyallup with him would you be mad at me for things progressing so quickly?”

“No. Not at all. I was going to suggest it actually. Are you considering it?”

“Wes told me… that he can make my dream come true. That all he wants is to be with me. Do you think he means that?”

“Wes doesn’t hide. He is the most open book I have ever met. He has to be with the level of anxiety he has. It’s the only way he can function. If he’s telling you all he wants is to be with you, to let you be home with Arlo and homeschool him like you originally wanted then he means that. Elijah, I know after Ashley the idea of someone taking care of you is scary and difficult. But you can put your faith in him. If I thought for a moment he was untrustworthy or that he wouldn’t step up to help you, I never would have told him to put Aurora into your class. I never would have let you get close to him. You’re my little brother and I will always protect you. So, if Wes is offering that, I suggest you take it. He adores you. We all see it. I know it might feel fast, but I have done nothing but talk about you for years. He knows exactly who you are and what you’ll need from him. Just put some trust in him and let him show you. He’s a fucking incredible man. If I hadn’t already been with Holly, I would have probably asked him on a date and scooped him up for myself. But the more I got to know him… the more I realized he was exactly the person you’ve been needing. Elijah… move to Puyallup. Build a family and life with Wes. I don’t believe in things moving at a specific pace. Things happen when they’re supposed to. It’s fate, silly. I’ve got mama. I’ll take care of her. You just make sure that when my daughter is born you bring Arlo and Aurora around once a week so Holly isn’t lonely.”

“I…” I smiled at Wesley and he wiped a tear away from my cheek, “I believe you. Thank you, Jeremiah. I’ll call mama and tell her.”

“Good. Tell Wes that if he does anything that hurts you, I will kill him.”

“Don’t you dare lay a hand on my… boyfriend.”

“Cute. Oh and next weekend, why don’t you bring the kids to us and go on that date you wanted? I think you could both use a break. We’ll bring the kids back up and we can have dinner together or something.”

I looked at Wesley and he nodded excitedly, “sure. That sounds good. I need to call mama now but te quiero, hermano. Hablamos pronto.”

“Llámame mañana si me necesitas.”

“Okay.”

I hung up with Jeremiah and set my phone on the table before shifting under the blanket and climbing into Wesley’s lap.

“Hola, mi novio,” I smiled.

“What the hell does that mean?” he laughed, “I think I need to learn Spanish.”

“Novio means boyfriend.”

“Oh… I like it. Yeah. Boyfriends… I haven’t had one of those in years,” he smiled, “is this… you saying yes?”

“It’s me saying yes. But I don’t want a separate bedroom. I want to share it with you. I… I don’t sleep well if you’re not next to me.”

“Me either,” he whispered and kissed me softly, squeezing my thigh with one hand, his other on my lower back, “are you sure? We’re being a bit impulsive right now.”

“I’m sure. It’ll be fine. We can make it work.”

“We can make it work,” he repeated before kissing me again, “Call your mama. I should call Sara later.”

“Okay,” I reached back, grabbing my phone and refusing to climb off of him.

“Hola, mi hijo. ¿Estás bien?” My mother answered.

“Hola mama. I’m okay. Um… I need to talk to you about something.”

“What is it?”

I gave Mina a rundown of everything that was going to be changing and she sighed softly before I could hear her laugh.

“Our sons are going to kill me, Hermana,” she called.

“Well they’re happy that’s what I care about,” Sara’s voice came thru.

“Mom?” Wesley stared at the phone surprised.

“Don’t think you can hide from me. I’m with Mina at Eli’s… what’s left of the house. Eli… I’m going to buy the land from your mama. I already own Wes’ rental property. Gonna combine everything into one big plot of land. It’ll be nice.”

“How in the world can you afford that?” Wesley laughed.

“Dumbass. What did I do before I retired?”

“Oh… that’s right.”

“Wait what did she do?” I smiled at him.

“Superintendent of the school district. She’s got… so much money,” Wesley smiled, “that sounds good.”

“When are you coming back to start moving stuff?”

“A few days,” Wesley gently rubbed my neck, “I think we need a little time for things to slow down. We’ll come down Wednesday or Thursday.”

“Okay,” Mina laughed, “Eli make sure you send in a resignation letter. I’ll hire the sub I have as a permanent teacher for your class. She’s doing great. I also need both of you to send in the form stating you're pulling the kids from school to homeschool them.”

“I’m so glad,” I sighed happily, “I’ll send all that in a bit. Gracias, mama.”

“Anything for you. We’ll see you soon.”

We hung up and I kissed Wesley softly, cherishing his warmth.

“What do you want to do today?” he smiled.

“Spend the day with our kids. Go shopping. Watch some movies. I need to learn the area too.”

“Then let's tell them what’s going on and head out for the day.”

“Perfect,” I rubbed our noses together.

Thank you, Wes.

I won’t be scared this time.