Kasumi: The live action One Piece is just amazing!

Aquila: It really is!  A great production, vivid characters, it’s absolutely fantastic.

K: But before we get into that, this week we have a sponsor!

A: Um, yes...we do...

K: So, tell us all about this sponsor!

A: I’d be delighted to...

K: We do have a sponsor, right?

A: Yes, we do – I took the message myself.  I even made a point of writing it down so that I wouldn’t forget!

K: And?

A: I may have misplaced the piece of paper it was written down on.  But, I know we have a sponsor!

K: You just don’t remember who it is.

A: That’s more or less correct, yes.  I mean, I’m sure it’s a good sponsor.  It’s not like it’s going to be organized crime, or something like that...I think.

K: Why would the Yakuza sponsor us?

A: Don’t sell us short!  We’re worthy of being sponsored by anybody.  The Yakuza would be proud to sponsor us, we’re just that good.

K: Yes, but hopefully we’re not taking a sponsorship from organized crime.

A: Yes.  Hopefully.

K: Wait...we’re wandering around in the story worlds – how are they going to get the money to us...whoever they are?

A: I don’t recall actually discussing that detail with them.

K: Right, so, this week’s episode is sponsored by somebody...somewhere...somehow.

A: And it’s probably not organized crime...we think.

K: So, let’s move on to One Piece.  That was a great series!

A: And it was really well done.  Although, for somebody who has spent his entire life wanting to be a pirate, Luffy really does miss the point of pirates in every possible way.  He doesn’t really steal all that much, he doesn’t murder people, he doesn’t take hostages...

K: That’s part of his charm.  I think the term he’s looking for is “treasure hunter.”

A: But he’s not the only one, is he?  I mean, all of them seem to miss the point of pirates.

K: Not sure I can agree with that.  The other pirates we meet are pretty scary.  Buggy the Clown had me on the edge of my seat, and Kuro was just terrifying.

A: Yes, but they aren’t really very good at pirating, are they?  Take Buggy, for example.

K: Doesn’t he destroy an entire town and kidnap its surviving population?

A: He does, but does he take their things and sail away?  No!  He sets up a circus tent!  At least it has something resembling a circus in it.  So, Buggy the Clown misses the point of everything but circus tents!

K: What about Kuro?

A: He was butlering.  It doesn’t matter if you’re secretly poisoning your boss, butlering isn’t pirating.

K: He was only pretending to butler.  It was part of a massive scheme to take over Kaya’s family shipyard once they come of age.

A: No.  He was telling himself that he was pretending to butler.  Was he was doing was butlering.

K: And poisoning Kaya?

A: That’s just butlering badly.

K: ...okay, fair.

A: Besides, the fact that there isn’t a pirate king by now is pretty much a stain on the lot of them, isn’t it?

K: What do you mean?

A: Well, nobody’s ever actually seen the One Piece, have they?

K: I guess not.

A: So, what’s stopping one of them from just claiming to have found it and declaring themselves king?  It’s not like Gold Roger is still alive to contradict them, is it?

K: Well, there’s honour.

A: They’re pirates – they make their living by taking other people’s belongings!

K: Honour among thieves is a thing.

A: And so is independence and making your own way!  What’s stopping somebody from just declaring themselves king anyway and building an empire without the One Piece?

K: Well, there are pirate fleets and warlords.

A: But not kings!  And after twenty years there should be at least one.  All of them miss the point of pirates!

K: And where does that leave Luffy?

A: Destined to be king.

K: Really?

A: Think about it, Kasumi!  This is a world in which everybody misses the point of pirates somehow, and Luffy misses the point of pirates more than anybody else – that makes him their perfect king!

K: Right...moving on, who’s your candidate for best girl?

A: Girls.  The Den Den Mushi.

K: What, the snail phones?

A: Absolutely – just look at how many difference voices they can do!

K: Right then.  We liked the live action One Piece, and apparently pirates are too honest...