I found myself in the main common area of the library, in a group with my Cani biology class. Diast decided to bring us for a change of scenery.

“Couldn’t you bring us outside or something if you wanted us to have a better view?” I asked.

“I think this library looks nice,” Diast said. She was in “coffee isn’t working” mode, making her an easy target for jokes.

“I bet you think a lot of things look nice,” I said.

“Yeah, yeah,” Diast said.

“I feel like fall semester Diast would’ve chewed me out for that one,” I said. “That was pretty rude for me to say, you know. Like thirty-seven percent out of pocket? Now when I say that to spring semester Diast? Nothing. You’ve really chilled out.”

“Well, having a kid mellows you out, I guess,” Diast muttered.

Nobody really noticed that, but I did. That little murmur confirmed my feeling that this would be the perfect time to finally enact a prank that had been brewing for ages.

“That’s very interesting,” I said.

I held all the power now.

Diast didn’t know it yet, but she’d be trembling in her boots soon enough.

Right when we got there, I said I had to use the bathroom. I actually did, but when I got back I didn’t go right to the class, all set up in the study tables. I went to the front desk, where Zeta's sister was working.

“Greetings,” I said cheerfully. “Could I take a minute of your time?”

“If you stop talking to me like that, yes,” Stella said.

“Whatever do you mean?” I said.

“That! That’s creepy,” Stella said. Her eyes narrowed. “Is it time?”

I nodded.

"Tell me what you're thinking," Stella said. "I wanna give feedback before the prank occurs. Will this line up with our previous talks?"

"I think so!" I said.

"Lemme make a quick call then," Stella said.

I was an only child, but I had plenty of friends who had siblings so I knew the power of a sibling ready for a goof such as this.

"Kay, here's what I'm thinking..."

My devious idea was a triple threat. One, prank Diast because even though she was aware a prank was coming, she thought it’d be entirely on Zates and not her. Two and three were Zeta (obviously) and Oka, who I had to prank too. I hoped I could also explain that I wasn’t mad at them, while still utilizing the idea that they didn't know that I knew about Stella and Diast against them.

I returned to the class with a book in hand, a prop given to me by Stella to drive the knife in even deeper.

Zeta was hunched over a phone that had some checkers looking app up on it. She scoffed as she made a wrong move, flipping all the pieces over to the opposing team's color. She was playing against Astrid, that girl from Fauni's clique, and it must have been her phone they were playing on.

"That is three to nothing now," Astrid said.

"Dang it!" Zeta said. "I can't figure out this game."

"Let me try!" Oka said.

"I think that's enough game time while we're in class," Lillia said. She swiped Astrid's phone and stomped away.

"Hey!" Astrid said.

"I'll give it back to you when class is over, for now it should be confiscated," Lillia said.

That little argument brought Lillia and Astrid away from the others, leaving Zeta and Oka alone at their table. It was almost too perfect.

I sat down, sighing as I put the old book with a maroon cover down. "Man, I've been reading this thing, and sheesh."

This ran the risk of them immediately responding with something like, "When's the last time you read a book?" Fortunately, my delivery only piqued their interest.

"What book is that?" Zeta asked.

"It's this story about this guy who runs a parade," I said. "And his best friend's mom has a secret affair with the mayor. And his best friend keeps that a secret, even when his mom has a baby with this mayor. They even kept the baby secret."

"Huh..." Zeta said.

"That's quite the plot," Oka said.

"And it just is hitting me in a weird way, you know like that riddle Michi said? It's like that same pit in my stomach," I lied. "Maybe it has me thinking about a riddle of my own. Like...what would I do in their shoes?"

Zeta laughed nervously.

"I would definitely lose all my trust in my friends," I said. "Maybe even all my faith in humanity."

"That's..." Oka trailed off.

With them stunned and trying to think up a response, it was time for the next step.

"Oh, Dr. Diast!" I said, waving our teacher over. "I have a question about this assignment."

Diast had no idea what she was in for. I could barely contain a grin brewing, I had to look solemn and all depressed for this to work. Zeta and Oka looked positively mortified.

"What's up?" Diast asked.

"Have you ever read Balloons of the Parade?" I asked.

"What does that have to do with the assignment?" Diast asked.

"Well, nothing much, but I read it and it's got me thinking, and until I get this figured out I don't know if I can finish this assignment," I said. "So, have you read it or not?"

"Can't say I have," Diast said.

"Well, it's quite the tale," I said. I went over the plot again. "It kind of reminds me of what you said a bit ago, Diast."

"What did I say?" Diast asked.

"You mentioned something about a kid mellowing you out," I said. "It made me wonder if you're like this mom and the mayor. Did you have a kid and not tell your favorite student, Kalei Koridia?"

This move ran the risk of Diast figuring out the prank immediately and dousing it by saying something like, "Yeah, the kid is Zeta." But I knew Diast enough to know how she'd react to me pulling something like this.

"You really wanna do this in class?" Diast said.

"So you do have a kid," I said. "I don't know how to process a teacher keeping something from me."

Diast groaned, and started to say something about private matters not needing to be said to every student. The rest of the class heard this and started to mutter, wondering about Diast's kid. Zeta and Oka looked like they wanted to speak up and clear her name, but were petrified in fear.

"Well, even if that's the case, at least it's just a secret you're keeping from me," I said. "If my best friends were involved in this lie, I don't know what I'd do. Well, again, faith lost completely in humanity. I'd probably lose all hope forever in everything."

Diast got hit with a rare case of not knowing what the hell to say to this, while Zeta and Oka looked like they were about to scream.

With her brow completely furrowed, Zeta finally spoke up. "Kalei...I...I should say...I should..."

"I...I guess we could start by saying..." Oka had a similarly contorted face.

The two struggled to form the right words as I started going on about all my hopes and joys or whatever fading away, just driving the knife in a bit deeper to make their reactions even funnier.

Leaving us with a perfect set up for the grand finale.

"U-um, excuse me," a high-pitched voice said. A kid with a dark red haired bowl cut who looked to be about ten years old waddled up to Dr. Diast with a folder in her hands. "I'm sure this is a bad time, but I keep trying to speak with you."

"To me? Who, uh. What is...?" Diast said.

The kid handed Diast the folder and had her open it. There was some biological science company logo on the side of it that seemed to drain all color from Diast's face. 

"Didn't you take part in the AB-805 Cani Health Sciences Festival?" the kid asked.

"I donated some blood, yeah," Diast said. "I mean, wait, no, I donated blood for the hospital during that, it was just in the same building!"

"Well, there must have been a mix up, because they used that blood to make me," the kid said. "I'm Rory, your clone daughter!"

"Wait, huh?" Zeta, innocent as she is, looked like she bought this story completely.

Never mind the logic of any of this, Stella's part of the plan preyed on the fact that Diast had actually donated blood in the same building as some clone research festival was going on. It was a weird detail just perfect enough to throw in and overload my teacher's brain, preventing her from being able to really question it.

"This is not the kid I was talking about," Diast said. 

The rest of class was fully engaged now, reacting to every line like it was a speech from a Haven fighter.

"I spent my whole life trying to find you," Rory said. "But you kept ignoring the calls."

"Dr. Diast..." Oka said, sounding like she found out Diast punched orphans for a living.

"The Cani Health Sciences Festival sends so many spam calls!" Diast said.

"That's no excuse," Rory coughed. "Especially because I'm dying."

"What? Kid, that's..." Diast said.

"You missed my whole life, Dr. Diast," Rory said. "And my ghost will probably haunt you forever..."

The kid kept rambling about dying of clone sickness or whatever. Zeta and Oka kept looking at me, I knew what they were trying to say, but they could only mutter in their stun-locked Zeta and Oka way while Diast tried to take control of the situation.

"No, kid, you're not, let me explain. Actually, I don't have to explain anything, because I just donated blood! It wasn't at the festival, I was at the clinic in the same building, they were doing a blood donation day! The...the spam calls! My real kid is...she's right..."

"Alright, I think that's good," Stella said, popping up from a hiding place behind a pillar.

"S-Stella?" Zeta stammered.

"Got that whole thing on video," Stella said, tapping her phone. "Priceless reactions, you three."

"Wh—" Diast said. "Huh?"

As Zeta, Oka, and Diast processed that they'd been had, I did an internal victory lap, not wanting to cheer too much, but still glad I finally pulled this one off. The rest of the class didn't really notice or care outside of some questions for Diast that she avoided by telling everyone to get back to work, but my main targets were successfully pranked.

"Wait, but who's...?" Zeta asked.

"Rory" did a twirl, shapeshifting into a possum Kanibari woman, Stella's friend Pippi.

"Pippi is a pro shapeshifter," Stella said. "I've had her on standby for this gig for weeks."

"Well, a pro for five minutes," Pippi said.

"Five minutes is all we needed," Stella said, high fiving her friend. I high fived both of them, too. "I didn't tell her to say that part about dying, by the way."

"I thought it'd add tension," Pippi said.

"Remind me to be careful about any info I give you," Dr. Diast said.

"Aw come on, this was pretty good, you almost bought it," Stella said. 

Diast laughed. "Yeah, I guess you got me."

"Hey, um, Miss Librarian Chick," Iris said, raising her hand. "What the hell is going on, exactly?"

"Just a little prank," Stella said. "As you probably know, I'm Zeta—"

"You're Zeta?" Iris interrupted. "Zeta from the future or something?"

"No, if you let me finish, I'm Zeta's big sister and her main guardian," Stella gestured to Zates, who looked like she was going to die from embarrassment at all the eyes on her even if this was info more than half the class knew already. "So since I'm dating your teacher, Zeta is Dr. Diast's kid."

"Ohhh," Iris said.

"That makes sense, yeah," Astrid chimed in.

"Yeah, she's my...canon daughter and all," Diast mumbled as she scratched the back of her head.

As the class chattered about this new gossip, I felt pretty damn pleased with myself.

"I thought I was going to have another sister," Zeta said when we got back to our assignment, doing that forced laugh she does when she gets really embarrassed and tries to act like she isn't.

“That was freaking mean, Kalei,” Oka said.

"Yeah, but it was funny to me at least," I said. I flipped through the pages of Balloons of the Parade.

"You never read that book, did you?" Oka asked.

"No, but Stella explained the plot to me," I said. "I think I like it now, though, maybe I'll check it out for real."

“Sorry we didn’t say anything,” Zeta said.

“It’s all good, I totally get it,” I said. “Consider this prank your apology and me accepting it.”

“Sure, sure,” Zeta said. “I will try to never have anything you could use as a prank on me again."

“I think that is a doomed prospect, my friend,” I said. “I will always find something to goof on my best friends for.”

“You’re saying that like it’s sentimental but it just sounds mean," Zeta said.

"It's sentimental to me!" I said.