“Which cocktail would you like to have?” the waiter returned and asked kindly, having watched me peruse the drinks menu.

“Nothing too sweet, rather sour. Can you recommend anything?”

“Well, let me check. They serve a really good cocktail at night, but I’m not sure if we can mix it now. Let me check with the bar if we have all the ingredients.”

“Sounds excellent. Thank you,” and off he was.

Wow, dedicated lunch and dinner cocktails, different ingredients to stock? I was stunned; I’d never heard of such a thing and wasn’t even aware of such neat detail. The cocktails I knew were the classic Mojito, which was usually filled with so many greens that one could start a minty rainforest; Caipirinha, often just loaded with spirits and sugar; Long Island Iced Tea, loaded with even more spirits; and then the never-ending list of cocktails that varied by name and color but not by taste; usually too sweet, too many ice cubes, too strong or simply too large. Hence, I was never that fond of cocktails until, just the day before, when I’d had a cocktail at lunch, and it had been glorious. Thus, I was in for another treat.

Checking if they would serve this dinner’s drink at lunch appeared not to be such a simple task because it took kind waiter quite a while to find out, which was so fine because the longer I waited, the more I relaxed and ‘arrived.’ Everything was good; my journal was with me, and I liked the music that played. Wait, wasn’t this even The Shins? The track from Garden State?

“Ooo – ooo, ooo – oo oo, o, oo, oo, o.” Of course it was. In the movie, the song symbolizes a big new beginning. Would this be one? The music, this warm summer’s day, the friendly smiles – oh, I just loved being here on this beautiful day, in this fantastic city, in this exciting restaurant, and I was proud of myself that I had made it. I was breathing, and I was grateful; I dropped Erika a message:

June 15 at 11:53 am to Erika Mobile

hi Erika, am about to have lunch at the restaurant – gorgeous it is! Thanks for suggesting it :-)

‘See, everything’s good. You’re fine,’ my mind was smiling at me warmly and just barely hid a naughty grin. And really, I was fine; I was sitting at this lovely table, looking at the buzzing street in front of me, watching people passing by, and enjoying being part of this scene. Gone were the silly worries. Lunch would be delicious, and the unsettling snapshot of that man and me was no longer unsettling. Instead, I felt my curiosity rising. Where was he? I hadn’t seen him anymore. Was he gone? Was he really another guest who had been on his way to leave? Had he made it to get the roses? Was he finding himself now in an embrace with his love?

Why, actually, had I been that startled? Nothing, really, nothing had happened. Instead, he was quite polite and appeared to have enjoyed that little sequence, but still… Something was just not right; something was not easy. He was civil, kind, amused, handsome and… I realized that I was shy about him. And… could it be… yeah… omg, yap, I realized that I was totally, absolutely intimidated by his beauty. Beauty! – and he had just been standing there, smiling, nothing else, and yet, his sheer beauty had completely gotten me off balance. What mysterious powers did it hold? And why was I afraid of it?