When Lacy first met Derby, the two were in high school. It was a moment that was hard for Lacy to forget, as the two turned a corner at the same time, smashing into each other. Lacy carried a tray of beads which flew everywhere, and Derby had a medicine container that did the same. The two stared at the mess of multi-colored beads and teal pills scattered around the floor.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry!" Derby said.

"No, it was me, let me help," Lacy said.

Derby kept apologizing as the two picked up the mess off the smooth stone floor.

"Frick, I'm so sweaty..." Derby said once they'd gathered everything and put them back in their container. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine!" Lacy said. "Are the pills OK? I think this floor is clean and they weren't down there too long."

"They should be OK," Derby said, looking at the pill container. "Oh, oops, one of your beads ended up in here."

A blue bead rested at the top of Derby's pills.

"Ah, you can keep it," Lacy said. "Something to remember me by, maybe?"

"O-OK..." Derby said. "I'd, heh, give you one of my pills as a trade but that'd be bad, probably."

"What's your favorite color?" Lacy asked.

"Uh, pink? Why?" Derby asked.

Lacy picked a pink bead out of her plastic case. "I'll just pretend this one is from you."

Lacy replayed that moment in her head a bunch over the coming months. Both she and Derby were shy, so they didn't become immediate friends. While Derby was shy in more of a "raise arms like a red panda when threatened meeting a new person" kind of way, Lacy was more of the type to blend into the background and watch from afar. She found herself studying Derby in class, staring at her at lunch, school began to revolve around Derby even if Lacy couldn't work up the nerve to talk to her outside of some passing conversation.

Lacy could only admit it deep in buried pages of her diary what all this Derby observing meant. She decided she'd make an attempt to bridge the gap between them a bit more, feeling butterflies in every step as she sat across from Derby at lunch. She usually sat at the same table as Derby, but the two were usually too far to have a conversation.

"Uh...hey there..." Lacy started, but her voice was too quiet. Making things worse, someone sat down next to her, and Derby's eyes lit up.

"Sage..." Derby said, sounding like she was reuniting with someone after decades apart.

Sage smiled back. "Sup, Derby? I just saw you in math, you know."

"Well, yeah, but..." Derby sighed longingly. "It's just great when you're around."

Lacy ate her lunch in silence, the butterflies inside her either going dormant or migrating from her entirely. There was no way she could compete with someone as cool as Sage. She spent the next week eating alone. That proved worse, as crying through PB&J's made the sandwiches much less enjoyable, and did a number on her mood in the afternoon classes.

She managed to pull herself together and return to the desk. Lacy hoped someone would say something. Like, "Where were you?" "We missed you!" Anything like that. But nobody said much when she sat down.

Derby was there though, and that made things a bit better. Even if she was visibly swooning over everything Sage said or did, seeing Derby happy brightened the world.

"Oh, hey," Sage said, suddenly looking right at Lacy. "Did you want to ask Derby something?"

"Huh?" Lacy said. "Me?"

Lacy's eyes darted to everyone at the table, primarily checking to see what Derby thought. Derby simply blushed and looked at her phone.

"Yeah, you looked like you had something for her, maybe I'm wrong," Sage said. "You should talk to her more. She won't bite."

Why bother? It's you she likes.

Lacy knew that was a selfish thought, but it was one she couldn't put away.

"Sage, don't say stuff like that about me!" Derby said.

"What, you want me to tell people you do bite them?" Sage asked.

"No! Just...don't talk about me!" Derby said.

"C'mon, I'm your biggest fan! I gotta support you getting more friends!" Sage said.

"Well...if you put it like that," Derby said.

Sage was able to talk to Derby so easily. And Derby listened to them, too. It wasn't fair.

The next day, Lacy stayed home sick. She did catch a cold, but most of the day was spent in tears. Lacy kept thinking about Derby's smile, her laugh...

I want Derby to be happy, she thought.

Yes. I want Derby to be happy, that's what I'm deciding.

Even if it...

Even if...

Lacy figured that Derby dating Sage was inevitable. But knew it was something that would protect Derby's smile. So even though it very well could ensure the feeling of butterflies flickering within her would never return, she told herself to root for the two. For Derby's sake.

Derby didn't know what to think. She apparently had a friend she'd known in school well enough that Aunt Emme knew her. But she couldn't remember that part. But that friend was also the modder she'd regularly commissioned and had some squabbles with. Her mom went back inside to bake something quickly for the group assembled outside.

"Derby of Hope, do you need me to slay this intruder?" Brie asked.

"No!" Derby said.

"You look incredibly anxious, are you sure this small girl isn't manipulating you?" Brie asked.

"She's not!" Derby said. "At least, I think, right?"

"Derby, maybe don't start sounding like you're gonna sell out your friends," Emme said. "Lacy's been over what, like three times?"

"That sounds about right," Lacy said.

"How do you remember her and not me?" Derby asked.

"She came over for that Fang Moon Web party! And your graduation. And...I forget the other one." Emme said.

"I think the third was just a game night," Lacy said.

"Right! And you helped me with that PC I was building at the time," Emme said. "C'mon Derbs, it's Lacy!"

"I'm trying to figure out how you remember these specific friend times..." Derby said.

"I take my vitamins, and do a memory game every day, so!" Emme said.

"Forget the memories, she's distressing Derby of Hope," Brie said.

"I'm not distressed, I'm just processing!" Derby said.

Brie stood tall over Lacy, an even more intimidating sight with the height difference between the two. "Are you friend or foe?"

"Friend, I hope," Lacy said.

"I...I'm sorry I get so testy about the mod prices!" Derby said. "Fantasy Bucks just cost a lot, and..."

"It's fine," Lacy laughed. "You're one of the nicer people I take commissions from."

"Say..." Emme said, squinting. "You aren't the one I commission for Fantastical Fantasy MMO, are you?"

"Depends, do you get them from someone with the username 'Talonsbetter?'" Lacy asked.

"Ope, no, phew," Emme said. "I'll just...leave it at that, then! Get my mods from someone else, heh..."

"Maybe some reintroductions are in order," Sage said. "I'm Sage, if you need the reminder."

"No, I remember everyone except for..." Lacy looked up, trying to meet Brie's eyes.

"I am Brie de Meaux, Dark Lord of the Umpeenth Realm," Brie said. "I am betrothed to Derby of Hope, so mind your manners around her."

"Wait, what?" Lacy laughed. "Like, seriously?"

Derby waved her hands wildly. "That's! We didn't even agree fully! Or maybe we did. Well, if we did it's only one to get Brie out of having to marry another dark lord or something! Brie, don't just go telling people that!"

"Why not?" Brie asked. "I would not hide my marriage of convenience to anyone! Though perhaps some people I would not be quick to mention the 'of convenience' part." Brie poked Lacy's shoulder. "Girl, you are no spy for any Skarlax realm, are you?"

"Dunno what that is, so I don't think I am," Lacy said.

"Most excellent," Brie said. "Oh! Derby of Hope!"

"Y-yes?" Derby said, looking like she was called on in class mid-nap.

"The Matriarch of Hope has scheduled my power test for tomorrow at 2:30, and I would like for you to attend," Brie said. "I would appreciate the support from my most trusted ally."

"Uh...tomorrow at 2:30...sure...? Let me check my schedule," Derby said.

"I'm sure her schedule is empty," Emme said.

"I can make sure she goes if you want, too," Sage said. "If you're cool with me, joining, too."

"Mmm," Brie looked upwards as she internally debated the idea. "I suppose. But if you cannot get Derby of Hope to come along, you stay away as well."

"Aw, I guess that makes sense though," Sage said.

Derby wasn't too thrilled about a scary new thing she had to go to, but something more pressing came to mind first.

"Hey...where'd Lacy go?" Derby asked.

Lacy tried to blink away the burning feeling in her eyes as she forged ahead. She wasn't sure where she was going, but she needed to get away.

It's been years, how does it still hurt so bad?

Not only was Sage still in the picture, but now a tall warrior lady? And the warrior chick said she wanted to marry Derby?

I thought I was over it. Over her.

Nothing ever changes though, does it?

It'd be fine. She could just tell Derby on the MMO that she had something come up. Then Derby could go back to forgetting her, and everything would pretty much stay the same.

She reached the corner of the street, a cross road that she figured would be a good metaphor when she wrote this in her diary later. As Lacy was about to load up a map to walk home or find the nearest bus route, she heard a shout behind her.

"Wait! Stop!" Derby was by herself, jogging, waving her arms even more frantically than before.

Lacy felt a strong pull to start running, to not deal with whatever Derby had to say. But she remained in place.

"Wait, please!" Derby said as she caught up, bumping slightly into Lacy as she skidded to a stop.

Derby took a few moments to catch her breath. Lacy used that time to wipe her eyes, but she was sure they were still red, giving away she'd been crying.

"I'm..." Derby said. "Frick, you got far in just a few minutes, hold on..." Derby wheezed a bit longer.

"Do you need to sit down?" Lacy asked.

"No, I'm fine!" Derby said. "I..."

Derby fidgeted with her shirt for a bit before finally looking up.

"I'm so sorry I forgot," Derby said. "We were friends before, and I apparently am stupid enough to forget something that important."

"It's OK...I'm used to it," Lacy said.

"Well, you shouldn't be!" Derby said. "You should always be remembered. And...I am also very grateful for all your modding help, so we've kind of still kept in touch? Which is kind of cool."

"I guess..." Lacy said.

"And! I...! I still want to be your friend now, if you're OK with that. I'll remember all the mods you've done for me, and maybe I'll remember the high school time, too. And I promise I won't ever forget you again."

Lacy's eyes were wide, and a few errant tears escaped down her cheeks. She wiped those away as she took small steps towards Derby. With those steps, a flickering feeling joined them, one she hadn't felt in so long. The wind blew with them, and Lacy thought for just a second she saw butterflies, just like the ones she'd imagined flying around within her whenever she was deep in her emotions about Derby Ofohp. At a second glance, they were just leaves floating through the air.

Maybe leaves would work better to describe it, Lacy thought. Leaves that swirl within me, that change with the seasons. Inside she'd felt like a tree in winter for a long, long while. Dormant, no leaves, hard to feel anything. But as Derby, still sweaty and out of breath, promised she'd never forget, it felt like the first leaves of spring sprouted.

"OK," Lacy said. "Yeah, that sounds great."