The sun was setting.
The streets were often the liveliest at this time of the day. People rushed home from school and work and students in the area wandered out to find entertainment for their evenings. The bus heading to the city central would be full.
Usually Anwyll would avoid taking this bus, but today he had somewhere to be before it would get too late. His steps barely made any sound against the asphalt, as if he could avoid the attention from people just by moving silently, like he had grown used to doing at home.
What attention he couldn't avoid, he tried his best to ignore and distract himself from with music.
His headphones had been the first of his investments with what little money he had managed to take from home. Cash, as per Koresh's instructions.
Through the last few years, the headphones had been one of the few things consistently granting him peace of mind. And yet, it did little to hinder the insistent fingers tugging on Anwyll’s hair to brush a few offending strands away from his eyes.
With a heavy exhale, he corrected himself. The headphones granted him peace of mind from anyone but Koresh as he was too stubborn to take a hint when Anwyll put the headphones on.
In response, Anwyll tossed his head to get the strands of hair back to their previous place, regardless of the inconvenience. The sound of low laughter cut through the music with ease when the song Anwyll was listening to reached its end. He sighed heavily and reluctantly pulled one of the headphones out.
"I won't be changing my mind, so stop it," he stated before Koresh could speak, annoyance evident in his voice. Koresh lifted his hand to his chest as if he had been physically wounded by Anwyll’s tone. Even with a subtle glance, Anwyll could see the amusement glinting in his eyes.
In that moment, Anwyll though he looked every bit like the British blue blood he claimed to be with his dark eyes and sculpted features.
"So aggressive," Koresh exclaimed, "you know I'm just looking out for you. You are so recklessly naïve sometimes." Anwyll frowned at him. He turned his gaze back to the street and the setting sun. The shadows played at the edges of his vision, hiding from the rays of light.
An elderly man frowned at him as he emerged from the shadowed alcove Anwyll had been staring at and Anwyll directed his eyes back forward again. Trust the living to make themselves known to him with their disapproval.
"He is my friend," Anwyll stated firmly, repeating the line he had been saying over and over again today. It was like a repeating battle of wills where neither of them wanted to back down.
Even when Anwyll wasn't naïve enough to think there was no truth to Koresh's words, he could feel a sliver of doubt entering his mind. There always was some truth to Koresh's words. He had known it since he had decided to leave his home with Koresh.
Not least because it was a fact that he wouldn't have made it farther than that without Koresh.
"A friend who ditched you without a word," Koresh added sharply, his eyes burning to the side of Anwyll's head. “You’re just setting yourself up for another disappointment.” Anwyll didn’t respond immediately, too sore over the reminder to protest.
“Something could have happened to him,” he said finally, his voice more faint with hesitation than he would have liked. Koresh sighed heavily and Anwyll caught a glimpse of him lifting his hands in a mocking surrender.
“Far be it from me to keep you from your bad decisions then. Turn left from here,” Koresh told him and Anwyll exhaled heavily in relief at Koresh’s surrender. He took the turn left, passing by a shabby corner store and kept his eyes on the road. He could never tell if the reflections on the glass were real or not.
“For the sake of honesty, I admit I am a bit hurt,” Koresh continued and Anwyll finally turned to look at him, confused and worried over the statement - and the evident hurt in his tone.
“What?” Anwyll asked, his annoyance and hesitation fading quickly at the thought that Koresh was hurt or upset with Anwyll. Koresh scoffed in a frustrated manner and rolled his eyes as he stuck his hands to his pockets. It still stood out slightly bizarre to Anwyll that among all the people Anwyll knew, Koresh was the one to pay most attention to his appearance.
He was pale, but not unhealthily so. Short raven hair with the slightest tint of warm brown that he kept on the verge of elegantly messy, just like his five-o-clock shade. And for reasons Anwyll could not understand, he preferred suit jackets with jeans and collared shirts with the uppermost buttons undone.
But it wasn’t as if Anwyll was going to complain. He was perhaps eight to ten years older than Anwyll, but Anwyll would willingly admit he looked good. To himself, that is.
Either way, he was sure Koresh knew his opinion as well, as he seemed to always know when Anwyll tried to sneak a peek at him.
“What has he ever done for you to warrant this amount of devotion?” Koresh asked and Anwyll frowned at the words and the stern tone they were delivered with. “Haven’t I always been here for you? I told you over and over again that he is bad news and that your feelings for him would never be-” An angry, embarrassed flush rose to Anwyll’s face, prompting him to cut Koresh off.
“I don’t care. I'm not doing this because of that. I’m just worried about him,” he interrupted Koresh insistently, but tried to make himself relax and soften his voice as he looked at Koresh more carefully. Koresh scoffed and looked ahead with a frown.
“This new good guy act doesn't suit you as well as you think it does. You missed a turn. Take left from here,” he told Anwyll, hiding his frustration under nonchalance. Anwyll followed his instruction and bit his lip as he considered his words to reassure Koresh.
“He’s my friend. I’m worried about him,” he said finally, slowly. “I want more friends, but it’s not like I’m trying to replace you.” Silence followed his words and he eyed Koresh’s reaction - or lack of it - in concern as the sunset warmed his back. A nagging sensation formed at the back of his mind, as if he was forgetting something. He dismissed it for now in favor of focusing on Koresh.
Another moment passed in silence, before Anwyll reached over to brush his arm against Koresh’s.
“Are we good?” he asked carefully. Another moment passed and Koresh finally leaned back against him, slightly.
“It is not as if I have a choice, is it?” he asked, resentment evident in his tone and Anwyll winced, lowering his eyes. “Continue straight.” The street narrowed into a one way street Anwyll knew to lead to his apartment.
…his apartment?
He slowed to stop, but found himself stumbling and continuing forward. Koresh had told him to go straight.
But the bus stop he had been heading to was to the west, by the main street.
“Keep going,” Koresh told him and Anwyll felt all doubt briefly leaving his mind. Koresh had never led him astray.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” Anwyll said softly, “you’re the one who told me to go with him in the first place.”
“You needed a place to spend the night at,” Koresh told him and scoffed, “I didn’t tell you to stay. He was trouble from the start.” Anwyll frowned and fell into stubborn silence. Orion had never been anything but kind to Anwyll, he wanted to point out, but he knew Koresh would disagree. He always had and likely always would. Rather than look at Koresh, he turned to look ahead and his steps fell to a halt.
“Keep going,” Koresh told him and Anwyll’s knees buckled as he felt himself moving forward.
“This is my place,” he pointed out with a frown.
“Isn't that where you were headed? Go back in and lock the door,” Koresh told him, authority seeping into his voice. The tone sent a shiver down Anwyll’s spine. The kind that never failed to make him want to rush to do whatever Koresh required of him. This time the shiver felt like cold water trickling down his back, but the result was the same.
It wasn’t as if he was in a hurry, he reasoned with himself, his footsteps echoing as he entered the stairway. It was better Koresh and he would talk this through in the privacy of his apartment. He could go see Orion tomorrow just as well.
The sound of his apartment door locking behind him was a comfort he had never experienced at his home.
“You can be so incredibly ungrateful and provileged sometimes,” Koresh observed and pushed on Anwyll’s back to prompt him to move from the door. Anwyll kicked his shoes off as he followed Koresh’s push and made his way to the kitchen, annoyed by the insistence. The realization he was back at his apartment finally sunk in, making him restless. He had been determined to go see Orion, but he had ended up back here regardless. Just because of Koresh's insistence.
“So you keep telling me,” he snapped back, the anxiety escaping him in a burst of anger. Koresh only used those words as an insult when he was being pissy anyway, knowing it would annoy Anwyll as well. If Anwyll was asked, he would have said Koresh was just as privileged as Anwyll was.
“Proving my point again,” Koresh said pointedly and Anwyll wanted to snap back at him, but bit the reaction back. The anxiety made him seethe, but he knew he couldn't afford that kind of reaction. He had never been nor would he ever be the one to finish the fight that would no doubt follow. He exhaled heavily to try to get on top of his emotions.
“I don’t want to argue,” he stated finally. He turned around to face Koresh, attempting a smile as he reached for Koresh's hands. “Or to be ungrateful. I just miss my friend.” Koresh didn’t respond immediately, but neither did he pull away from Anwyll’s touch. Dark eyes locked onto Anwyll’s murky green ones and Anwyll searched for any sign to read Koresh’s mood. To figure out what this argument was really about. Something like disappointment flashed behind his eyes and was gone too soon for Anwyll to make sure, before Koresh’s expression melted into indifference. Anwyll wasn't sure which was worse.
“There it is again. Everything is about Orion nowadays, is it? And has been ever since he ditched you,” Koresh sighed as his eyes drifted over Anwyll in a disinterested manner. Whatever his eyes landed on behind him seemed much more interesting to him than Anwyll and something like curiosity crossed over his face.
“You are exaggerating,” Anwyll told him with a frown, but didn’t resist when Koresh pushed on his shoulder to prompt him to turn, his other hand wrapping around the back of Anwyll’s hand.
“Am I now? I think it is rather exhausting. Orion this, Orion that,” Koresh told him, but his voice was distant, “pick up the knife.” Anwyll blinked in confusion, before he turned to where Koresh was looking just as Koresh guided Anwyll’s hand to the knife. Without really considering the action, Anwyll's fingers curled around the handle of the knife.
"That is a bit creepy,” Anwyll noted at Koresh, trying to hide the way he was a bit unnerved under a joking tone. "You could just tell me you think the kitchen is a mess." Not like Anwyll could disagree. He had been meaning to wash his dishes for a couple of days now. Despite the joking, he felt the remnants of his anger dissipate as if driven away by the feel of the wooden knife handle in his palm.
The room suddenly felt just a bit colder.
“It's not just the kitchen that is a mess,” Koresh noted lightly and caressed his fingers over Anwyll's wrist. Anwyll would have loved nothing more than to press against Koresh and let him lead, to bury the sore feelings under gentle touches. But the glint of metal in his hands made him hold still.
He laughed shortly to ward off the nervousness, willing to take Koresh's comment as a joke to keep the peace. The sound was cut off by the feeling of Koresh’s fingers brushing just slightly under Anwyll’s sleeve, against his skin. The touch was warm, even when lacking the heartbeat.
“It’s quite obvious how unhappy you are with me, without Orion,” Koresh continued and pushed Anwyll’s sleeve up to his elbow. “So I will do one more favor for you.” Anwyll held still, trying to navigate through the whiplash of the sudden change in the mood.
He was just overreacting, he told himself. It was just a kitchen utensil, nothing about the situation had changed.
"Just one?" he asked, aiming for a similar light tone as what Koresh used, but his voice came out faint instead.
"One," Koresh confirmed and took a hold of Anwyll's free hand, turning it around to bare his palm and inner wrist. "Cut open your wrist."
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