TRIGGER WARNING: Topics related to suicide, incurable diseases etc. 

Prions are misfolded proteins which characterize several fatal neurodegenerative diseases in animals and humans. It is not known what causes the normal prion protein to misfold; the abnormal 3-D structure is suspected to confer infectious properties.

All known prion diseases in mammals affect the structure of the brain or other neural tissue; all are progressive, have no known effective treatment and are always fatal.

(Wikipedia)

When I visited the medical laboratory, which my friend doctor suggested to me, to perform the medical examination, I had no idea how drastically it will change my life. I knew that that laboratory is not just an usual medical clinic, but also a research facility. A variety of medical tests was conducted here, and they often suggested their patients to participate in testing of their new methods of disease detection. So, when I came to perform the full blood examination, they suggested me an additional experimental analyses for prion diseases for free. I didn't think that I have any of those, because they are, you know, pretty rare. I just didn't mind to help those guys with gaining material for their research.

But here is the result.

I definitely have misfolded proteins in my brain; probably, I gained them just sporadically.

You know, something always can go wrong inside of your brain. And even if the event have a very, very small probability, it will happen. Sometimes. With some unlucky people. And now that unlucky person is me. I will inevitable slowly degrade for the several years, until my brain will lose its functions and I'll die. Ironically, they developed just the detection, but not a cure.

That was a hard blow.

I am the mathematician, my intellect means everything for me. And now I am doomed to losing it slowly due the disease progress.

But for now, my brain is still functioning, and I will continue to do math. I will dive into the mystery of numbers and formulas, surfaces and dimensions. I will try to solve the problem of millenium. I will keep trying while I will be able to do it. And when I will not able to do it anymore, I'll kill myself. I hope that I will find a guts to end it before I will turn into imbecile vegetable. I want to die as a human being, after all.

So, now my last mathematical journey begins.