I sat in my bed, looking up at the ceiling. I’m thinking of all the stuff I like and it just sounds boring as fuck. It’s almost 1:00, I have to go to a dinner party tomorrow, I really don’t have the motivation to do anything. It’s been a week since I left my house. I’m convinced my anxiety has took over. I can’t leave, I always think something terrible will happen as soon as I inhale the pleasant aroma of the environment, whether it be someone comes up and stabs me. I mean, it could happen.

I forgot to introduce myself: I’m Elise. My last name? Well, I know you weren’t really wondering but it’s Valen. I’m 19 and I can’t fucking leave the house. I also still live with my parents, but that’s because of extreme paranoia. I was homeschooled after 4th grade. I couldn’t take the pressure, and I know what you’re thinking, “Pressure in 4th grade? What?”. I didn’t fail to mention that I had crippling anxiety. Curse my genes.

I got a diploma, just so you know. If you thought I didn’t have an education. But, I will get into college! With help of my best friends of course, Julian, Rose and Mira.

They've never actually helped me before. In 3rd grade, they always got me in trouble. Then I dropped out after but it wasn't because of their harassment, as I said before, it was anxiety.

I guess another reason is because I burst out in anger at random times and then I feel disappointed and then comes more mood switches. It wasn't hormones, there's an actual reason as to why. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder