I got back to the fortress of solitude and curled into my comforter as I started binge watching star trek for the billionth time. It's an amazing show.

"Picard is so dreamy!" I sigh.

"Yeah nothing more attractive than an old french dude, with no hair who could bore you to death." I pause the show and turn to Emillia who is standing in my door way. "Picard is much more than that you twat!" I tell her. "Yeah, yeah you've told me a million and one times already." she tells me flopping down on my bed. "Then you should already know that Picard is handsome because he is so romantic! And honestly just handsome!" I giggle loving the look of disgust Emi is giving me. "He could be your grandpa! Your great grandpa!" "I could really care less." I tell her turning back to the screen to turn it on when her hand reaches over and swipes Sam's card off my desk.

"So, who's Samuel?" She asks. I reach out to grab it away from her but she just holds it above her head. "Curse you tall people." I tell her flopping down back in my chair. "So, Who is he?" She asks far to eager for the lazy side of me. "A guy." I tell her. "Well that was slightly obvious love." she says moving closer and closer until I could feel her breath on my face. "Who. Is. Samuel?" she asks one word at a time. "A nice guy who offered me dream cookies." I tell her trying to get back to my show. "A nice guy offered you cookies? Is he a murderer? Does he want to kidnap you? Does he just want you for sex? did he drive a white van?" she bombards me with questions. "I. Don't. Know." I tell her slowing her down. "Anyway why are you being the depressing one? That's my job!" I tell her trying to pout ending up laughing. "August this is serious...he could hurt you." she tells me.

"Remember what your always telling me. Your the one who told me to get out of the house in the first place!" I tell her in a huff. "Yes, get out of the house not fall for the first random guy you meet who offers you cookies!" "They were dream cookies and I didn't fall for him." I tell her crossing my arms. "Yeah whatever." she says starting to pace.

"Sit down son yer making me nervous." I tell her in the best accent I've done yet.

"That was pretty good." she says taking a seat.

"Are you going to calm down now?" I ask. "Probably not but I mean if you died I would not only lose a friend but I would also be jobless!" She says. "Wow...I know where we stand then." I say before turning around and going back to watching star trek.

"Would you put that thing away for just one second?" Emi asks sounding very perturbed .

"I'm calling him, that's the end of it. that's all there is there isn't anymore."

"Really? Quoting Madeline now? That's just low!" "Deal with it! I'm calling him, he will buy me cookies then we will be FRIENDS nothing more." I tell her sternly.

"Fine, but if you end up like Laura Wolf, don't come running back to me!" she tells me throwing up her hands in frustration. "That was a totally different scenario, they met at a bar not outside a coffee shop!" I tell her as she storms out my door slamming it behind her. I breathe deeply and sigh. "How am I the positive one in this situation?" I ask no one in particular.

For the rest of the day I stayed in my fortress of solitude and that night I managed to write three chapters for my next book. After I curled up like a burrito in my blanket I tripped and fell on the floor which is where you will find me now watching as the fan spins around and around making me feel a bit dizzy.

"Why can't Emi waltz in now like she does any other time of day?!" I yell thrashing around.

"Lucifer! Help me you lazy bum!!" I yell trying to get my sisters lazy bum of a cat to help me.

"You do realize he's a cat right?" I wiggle so I can see the door and find my older sister Adriana standing there, her evil face marked with a satisfied smirk. "Help me woman!" I tell her squirming around. "Selfie first!" She says coming over and lying down next to me snapping a picture then standing and laughing at me. "Your a true sister..." I say as sarcastically as I can. "That's the sweetest thing a burrito has ever said to me!" she says laughing as she reaches for a piece of my blanket and pulls. I roll out and onto the floor in a wadded up lump of human like mass.

"So I heard from Emikins you needed some sense beat into you, what have you done this time?" she asks and I simply sigh. "I got the number of a nice guy." "And I need to get involved why, again?" she asks. "My question exactly!" I say. "Your a grown woman, if you want to get kidnapped and murdered like Laura Wolf go right ahead." She tells me making me laugh. "Thanks, I keep getting compared to her for some reason." I say stroking my nonexistent beard.

"Hey Luci, is she treating you nice?" Adriana asks. Lucifer the devil cat simply hisses at me. "That nice huh?" She asks giving me a look of disdain.

Have you ever wanted to know the meaning of that word? Disdain, it's something my sister looks at me with on a regular basis. The word disdain is the feeling that someone in this case i.e. me is unworthy of one's i.e. my sister's consideration or respect better know as contempt. I don't spoil her cat with endless fish buffets and belly rubs and suddenly I have this look directed at me. I work hard everyday becoming a top selling writer and yet I'm not good enough for my sister because her cat hates me. SERIOUSLY?!

"Get up lazy butt!" there in the door way is my younger brother Adam. "Get up and feed me woman!" "Go get your own food!" I yell. "But you make it soooo much better than me! PLEASEEEEE!" I take time for breathing, mulling over the ending, trying to block out the endless please from Adam not succeeding and in the end nodding just to shut him up. Unbeknownst to him I'm nuking a hot dog.

Stupid siblings...

So much for the fortress of solitude.